The Green Fairy
by DinoGlitter
Summary: Noel is a french assassin who can't help falling for the most temperamental brat in the underground. Xanxus is a trigger happy man-child who can not do feelings but is possessive of said assassin. They both have their own issues and goals but they would raze the earth for one another.
1. The Green Fairy Drabbles

**Job**

Heavy bass vibrates through Noel's body as he was forced to sit in a dimly lit booth. The man he was meant to kill trailed his fingers along Noel's side as he continued the conversation with his partner. Noel was bored out of his mind and entirely too sober for this assignment. Looking out over the dance floor he sipped the poor excuse for a drink the bastard ordered for him. This was Noel's specialty and yet he found himself being irritated by the small, silk cheongsam that hugged his body. His wig was irritating his scalp and the silicone balloons he stuffed in the dress were shifting. He could not keep this charade up much longer.

While the man's back was turned Noel slipped a slow killing poison into his martini before extracting himself from the other man's lap. The man glanced at Noel before downing the remnants of his drink. Noel smirked turning his back to him.

"I want to dance." Noel said glancing over his shoulder with hooded eyes.

He knew this pig of a man would fall before the bass dropped.

 **Brother**

A head full of silky seafoam green hair bobbed slightly to the music coming from a large pair of headphones. A small child with identical hair sat nestled into the elder's lap. Noel had a very tiring day and only wanted to sit and relax in his little brother's presence. He pushed his waist length hair over his shoulder to keep it out of his face. Noel glanced down into the sleeping face of his precious brother Fran and smiled. He pulled him closer as they lounged on the porch of their grandmother's home.

He remembered when they both came to live with her. Their parents were dead and their grandmother graciously opened her home to them. In return for her kindness, he stashed a majority of his earnings away in case anything happened to him. The money would take care of them well into Fran's young adult years. Noel knew one day he would leave for a mission never to come back to this house.

"What's wrong Nelly?" The sleep heavy voice of his brother asked.

Noel stared down into the drooping eyes of his brother and gave a small smile.

"Nothing ma petite Sirène just drifted off for a second there."

 **Punch**

Noel threw the first punch in the fight clipping the blonde's chin. An angry glare was directed his way from the teen on the ground. Noel jumped on top of him wrapping his thin fingers around the boy's neck in a vice grip. All the noise around him drowned out as Noel applied more pressure. A bullet was shot dangerously close to his head and made him pause in his actions. A male with short silver hair stood behind Noel with a scowl on his. The second male with short black hair and tan skin was behind him.

"VOI! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!" The silver guy yelled.

Noel gave him a blank stare as he stood from his position straddling the teen below him. He glanced down at the coughing blonde before eyeing the silverette again.

"He called me a girl and then proceeded to hit on me with the most horrible pick up lines I have ever heard."

There was a long pause before the silverette sighed.

"Fucks sake Dino."

 **Names**

"So you are the assassin called The Green Fairy?" The blonde, now known as Dino, asked. "You know you're really famous right." Dino grinned at him.

"Of course I do, I worked hard for that title."

The other males, Squalo and Xanxus, sat by quietly as the blonde continued to rattle off useless questions. Noel was amused by his curiosity, but it was quickly becoming annoying. Giving the teen a sweet smile Noel leaned into Dino's personal space.

"My name is Noel if you were curious about that too idiote mignonne."

Dino blushed and stuttered over his words in an attempt to come up with a reply. Squalo laughed at his misfortune and Xanxus just smirked enjoying the humiliation the Frenchman dished out. Noel enjoyed their company. He never really had friends before and wanted to savor the feelings he gained from this encounter.

 **Respect**

Noel respected Xanxus to the highest degree. He was a passionate teen and showed it with his dedication to his training regiment and family. Noel had not seen such devotion in a person since he started in the assassination business. The power behind his ruby eyes has always given off the feeling of a lion hunting its prey. Noel would be lying if he said Xanxus was an unattractive guy. He would also be lying if he said he wasn't attracted to the beast of a teen. Something about how he carried himself always drew Noel's eyes to him.

A cough drew Noel from his thoughts as he turned to the source. His grandmother was sick with the flu, but luckily she would pull through it. She was the only other person to have his full respect for their actions. Fran sat at his elder brother's side holding a glass of water up to their grandmother. She smiled taking the glass from him. Noel leaned down pressing a light kiss to the top of Fran's head. Fran gave a grimace and tried to push his brother away from him.

"Stop it; no one wants your fairy germs frère." Fran whined causing their grandmother to laugh.

 **Absinthe**

In the months since their meeting Xanxus and Noel found that they had many things in common. They both enjoy weapon crafting, Xanxus preferred guns and Noel blades, taking long naps, and drinking. It was a common sight to see the two sipping their preferred drinks in the maze garden whenever the green haired teen visited. Nono never approved of it, but it kept the two from destroying his home. Again. Xanxus scoffed at Noel's choice of liquor while drinking from his glass of expensive tequila.

"How can you stand that shit?"

Noel ignored him and poured water on to the sugar cubes positioned over his glass of absinthe.

"Just because you don't have the patience to wait for a good thing doesn't mean I have to suffer the same way and miss out on life." Noel said sipping the fluorescent green drink.

Xanxus glared at him before tossing back the last of his tequila. They sat in a comfortable silence as they waited for the usual alcohol is a crutch speech from an overprotective dad.

 **Talent**

The needle is an ingenious thing. It was small enough to hide but just as lethal as any sword could be if used correctly. Noel just so happens to coat his needles in various poisons. A special hallucinogen he developed is his personal favorite. He prides himself on its creation and many others. The victims of the lethal drug sometimes claim that a glowing fairy attacked them when under its effects. That is also due to the fact that Noel enjoys screwing with them by occasionally dressing up like Tinkerbelle when he goes out on a job.

Swords, daggers, and knives were also a part of Noel's arsenal so Squalo became a welcome sparring partner. They found excitement and a challenge in one another. Since Squalo started growing his hair out they would often swap beauty tips. It was very common to hear them speak of slitting someone's throat one minute and then recommend a certain brand of expensive salon grade conditioner the next. Lussuria would usually be present for these discussions and often lead them into a weird and highly dangerous spa party of sorts. It was well known that whoever interrupted them did not see the day again. Noel did need a steady flow of test subjects to work on, Squalo needed training dummies, and Lussuria would take care of any discarded bodies of course. Neither Noel nor Squalo wanted to know what happened to those poor souls.

 **Child**

"Are you kidding me?" Noel asked in a flat tone as an 8-year-old blonde played with his hair laughing in a very disturbing way.

Squalo scoffed looking anywhere but into Noel's searing gaze. Xanxus was in a similar position only he didn't actually care what was happening.

"Please tell me you did not kidnap him from some lesser family." Noel sighed absentmindedly petting the laughing child's head.

"HELL NO WHO WOULD WILLINGLY TAKE THAT LITTLE BASTARD!" Squalo yelled looking very offended at the accusation.

Noel gazed down at the boy taking his pudgy cheeks in his hands. The boy froze in anticipation for the elder's next move. Noel smirked at his actions and kissed his forehead. The boy recoiled in disgust but didn't leave his lap.

"The prince does not appreciate your coddling."

"Well baby Bel besides Lussuria, I am the only one you would receive any large amount of attention or affection from in this place." Noel replied with a teasing grin. "Your spoiled antics would be completely ignored by everyone else here darling."

Belphegor looked thoughtful for a bit before giving a Cheshire grin. This peasant would surely give him the entertainment he craved if not more.

"Shishishi then you shall be the prince's governess."

Noel stared at him in confusion. Xanxus smirked at him in obvious amusement. Squalo snickered behind his hand. Only one thing went through his mind.

"You think I'm a woman don't you." Noel sighed in exasperation. "I'm not even in drag."

 **Gift**

Xanxus glared as he was surrounded by party guests. Enrico sat beside him with a glass of wine in his hand watching his brother. He, as well as Massimo and Fredrico, had noticed Xanxus' attention on a teal-haired girl. She was facing away from them showing off the low back of her intricately beaded, cream 20's gown. The grin on Enrico's face stretched wider as she turned around. The collar was modest showing no cleavage, the hemline came a few inches above the ankle, and a pair of cream pumps adorned her feet. Her face was made up in soft pink tones and her hair was in a braided bun. Her eyes flicked over to Xanxus and a smile lit up her face.

"So who is that little pearl that has your attention, Fratello?"

"A guy." Xanxus smirked watching Enrico freeze up in shock.

Xanxus turned his eyes on the approaching figure. He had his hands clasped behind him as he leaned down and kissed Xanxus' cheek.

"I know you hate social gatherings Xanxus, but it is your birthday dear." Noel said. "I got you a gift and you absolutely cannot bitch about it so smile."

Xanxus held out a hand expectantly. Noel placed a small box in his hand and stepped back waiting anxiously for Xanxus' reaction. Tan hands unraveled the ribbon surrounding the box. As Xanxus opened the gift his eyes widened in shock at what lay inside. A necklace with a blue crystal pendant.

"It's like the one you told me about right?" Noel smiled. "The one your mom had."

Enrico stared in shock before standing and going to find his brothers. Xanxus looked up at Noel and gave him a microscopic smile. Noel grinned happily in return.

 **Date**

Xanxus had never done this before. Most of the female population threw themselves at his feet so asking was never needed. He gazed across the table at the smaller male who gazed back with equal levels of uncertainty. Noel was just as nervous about this date as Xanxus was.

The posh atmosphere of the restaurant was very awkward for the two teens. They were so use to quiet simplicity of the vongola gardens with the occasional shout from Squalo. Xanxus grit his teeth and swore this was the last time he would take advice from his brothers. He just wanted to do something for Noel, his Noel. He glared at the other boy until Noel focused his attention on him and only him. That was how it should always be. Xanxus was selfish and those eyes were meant for only him.

"You are mine." Xanxus grunted.

Noel just gave an exasperated sigh before nodding.

"Yes, all yours."

 **Desire**

Xanxus knew he was attractive. He didn't need the useless trash around him telling him how sexy he was to know that. All it really took was Noel's appreciative stare and heat of the moment kisses to know he was desired.

As Xanxus leaned against his pillows, with the thick canopy closed around the bed and encasing him in the dark, he stared down at the sleeping face of his assassin. The soft breathing told Xanxus that the boy was dead asleep. He leaned down and brushed his fingers through the soft hair on Noel's head. Nothing was going to take this from him and if someone tried he would just put a bullet through their skull and carve the varia crest into their chest for good measure. No one fucks with Xanxus.

A confused moan escaped the smaller teen as he sleepily gazed up into the others angry red eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Xanxus scoffed. "And there never will be."

 **Devotion**

Noel loved Xanxus. He came to accept this fact rather quickly. The time they shared was precious to him. He trusted Xanxus with everything, even the location of his little brother and grandmother. So to see his love hurting over the truth of his parentage was like a stab at his heart. All he could do was hold his lover in his arms and offer words of comfort. No matter what Xanxus would do in this situation, Noel would stand firmly behind him.

"I'm going to kill him." Xanxus growled.

"If that's what you want I'm with you, and so are the others." Noel replied.

That night they would attack the Vongola, and Xanxus would fail. However the ninth wouldn't count on that teal haired boy jumping in to shield Xanxus only to be frozen with him. His heart was heavy with regret at the sight of his son and Noel frozen in an embrace.

 **Thoughts**

Fran could see it in his grandmother's solemn face. Noel was gone. She didn't need to say anything and he, in turn, wouldn't comment. Fran knew his elder brother did some criminal things. He just thought he would have more time with his most beloved person before he disappeared.

The Varia was under constant surveillance. They lost their boss and it left them in a limbo of sorts. They were banned from missions and confined to the Varia estate outside of Venice. Squalo took the lead and swore they would free their boss. The fact that Noel jumped in front of Xanxus in an attempt to save him was not lost on them. His actions were brave and deserved recognition from the entirety of Vongola.

Noel felt nothing. It was like he was suspended in a blank space with nothing but his thoughts for company. All Noel wanted was to feel his lover's arms and warmth around him. He missed passionate nights and lazy afternoons. His brother probably thought he was dead. The Varia was more than likely plotting revenge. Everything was cold and silent. Noel wanted Xanxus.

 **Free**

A crack appeared in a large chunk of ice. 2 bodies were wound around one another encased within. Squalo smirked. Their plan was working. The crack spread as an orange glowing light started to seep out of the ice. A loud explosion occurred, kicking up dirt and forcing Varia members to back away.

When the dust cleared the larger figure was kneeling on the floor while supporting the smaller. Both had not aged a day since they were frozen 8 years ago. Blood red eyes opened and looked up glaring at his aged officers. A startling pair of teal eyes followed only to stare in shock.

"About time trash."

"Squalo your hair is gorgeous."

Xanxus glared at his lover and then proceeded to drag him up and out of the basement chamber.

Scars

It felt right to sit on his lover's lap. Noel couldn't bear to leave him for more than a few minutes. Despite being stuck in a hug for 8 years it felt as if they had been separated for far longer. Xanxus didn't complain about his clingy attitude. If anything he encouraged the behavior.

Noel made a vow to stand at his side no matter what Xanxus did. He was the only person in the world with the complete trust of the Varia's leader. He devoted his entire being to Noel and in return, he received far more. Noel went above and beyond and even tried to die for him. Xanxus refused to allow anything like that to ever happen again.

"What do we do now boss?" Noel smiled.

"We get a cloud." Xanxus grunted.

Noel kisses his scarred cheek and gave him a cheery smile. Xanxus stared at the similar scars littering Noel's pale skin. He grimaced and tugged the teal haired man into a tighter embrace. Never again would he let harm come to his love.

 **Favorites**

Lussuria made it known to everyone that Noel was his favorite. He constantly showered the teal haired man with affection and clothes. Lussuria even went so far as to dress him up at the most inappropriate of times.

"Lulu I love you dearly, but can this alteration wait?" Noel asked politely as he crouched on the edge of a building surveying his target below.

"No, I told you darling that everything you wear must have lace and frills." Lussuria chimed. "Your figure and face simply demand it."

Noel sighed as the older male continued to sew the lace ruffle onto his shorts. He saw his target exit a cafe across the road. He swiftly pulled out his modified dart gun and lined up his shot with the scope. Noel smiled pulling the trigger and watching the man start to choke and fall. His guards scattered searching for the assailant.

Humming a happy tune Noel stood before studying his newly altered bottoms. The ruffled lace ran along the hem of his black mid-thigh shorts and looked more like a skirt now.

"They are cute, I'm sure Xanxus will appreciate them even more than he did before." Noel said to the flamboyant man.

Lussuria just squealed. Noel was defiantly his favorite.

 **Plotting**

The gola mosca was weird. Noel stared it down for a good half hour before being dragged away by a scowling Xanxus. Noel couldn't shake the feeling that something was off about it, even more so since he wasn't allowed to retrieve the damn thing. Xanxus gave him half-ass excuses about it. Noel would figure this out and his lover's true goals. He would not let Xanxus fall into another metaphorical pit.

He jumped in front of Xanxus to protect him and to show how much love He has for Xanxus. The fact that he wasn't Nono's son did nothing to keep Noel from giving Xanxus affection. He loved him and would always choose what is best for his love. So whatever plan Xanxus was putting into action was not going to be good for him.

 **Drunk**

It took A LOT of alcohol to get Noel drunk. Mammon knew this very well. However, someone paid him good money for video of drunken Noel and he was going to get it. So he acquired 3 large bottles of ever clear and sat them in the kitchen for Noel to find. And find he did.

After a particularly stressful day of dealing with the Varia and their childish antics, Noel deserved a drink. Those bottles on the counter were practically singing his name. Looking back he probably should have read the bottle before cannonballing the first bottle in one go because he couldn't remember the next 36 hours of his life. Mammon was kind enough to tell him why the Varia underlings were now avoiding him, for the right price of course. The disk he was handed showed exactly what he feared anyone knowing. He was a combination flirty/aggressive drunk.

The first scenes were him finishing the 2nd overly large bottle of grain alcohol and then clutching the 3rd to his chest and stumbling all the way to the training room in the basement of the manor. He went right up to Squalo and tugged the man down to his height before crushing their lips together. Noel stared in horror as he watched himself aggressively mouth raping 6 of Squalo's underlings before being dragged to Xanxus's office by a blushing shark commander.

"YOU DEAL WITH THIS LITTLE SHIT!"Squalo screamed at Xanxus before throwing the smirking tealette at his boss's feet and slamming the door.

Xanxus then took full advantage of his smashed boyfriend, but the video stopped right as Xanxus ripped off the younger male's top. Noel groaned in embarrassment. Mammon smirked.

"Dino was the one who paid to have a video of you drunk." The floating baby said watching the killer intent bubble out of the other. "And Reborn paid me for video of Dino getting attacked with his own whip, as training of course."

Noel turned to the baby with a bloodthirsty grin that spelled out revenge.

 **News**

To come out of an icy coma only to learn your older brothers are dead is a truly depressing thing. Noel couldn't understand what his lover was going through. Now there is word of a child in Japan who will take their place. Xanxus flipped his shit. He wanted the boss position. Noel really didn't understand where he was coming from but knew it was important to Xanxus. He swore to stay by Xanxus' side through everything that could possibly happen to them. Fran was a constant thought at the front of his mind. Noel would raze the world for Fran and rebuild from the ashes in Xanxus' favor.

He killed without hesitation on an almost daily basis and never felt anything as long as children were not involved. Noel's mentality revolved around only three things his job, brother, and lover. So the fact that Xanxus sent Squalo after the Vongola rings sent up red flags. He knew shit had hit the fan and the situation would only escalate from there.

 **Rings**

They were fakes. Noel could feel the anger that rolled off his lover. Xanxus dragged The Varia to their private jet and set course for Japan. The tension was thick and Noel worried about the end result of this trip. Xanxus didn't want his lover to come. He ordered Noel to remain at the hotel, but the tealette didn't listen and remained at his side. He could see and feel the confused eyes on him from Iemitsu and Reborn, but he ignored them. His face was a blank slate as he took in the fluffy haired Sawada Tsunayoshi.

The first impression the teen made was of a fearful child. Noel felt sorry for him. The threats were made and the trials were set. A battle for the rings had begun. He would watch and wait until the right time to step in. He would never let his love fall.

 **Sun**

Lulu seemed so excited for his fight. He even got Noel to wear a cute little cheer uniform for him. Mammon was paid upfront for snapshots. His confidence didn't last and Noel's worried disposition only grew. They all knew the fate that comes with failure.

When Noel saw his best friend fall he nearly cried. He rushed him to the hospital when the other Varia members walked away. He stayed with Lussuria until the male was stable. He wasn't expecting to return to the hotel that night. He ended up staying for days. Xanxus would think twice about trying to pull Noel away.

 **Lightning**

They sent a child to fight. Nothing could have disgusted Noel more than Imeitsu choosing a child as the lightning candidate. Levi was already a waste in his eyes and now this supposed father was too. Noel would never subject his precious brother to this and he hated that he couldn't help the little cow child.

When Lambo jumped into the bazooka Noel held his breath. He had heard of the ten-year bazooka but worried about the time limit. Teen Lambo emerged from the smoke, only for a few minutes before he used the bazooka again, but it was the twenty years later Lambo who gave the most fight. That, however, did nothing to stop a 5-year-old from being sent to the hospital. Noel actually went out of his way to comfort Nana Sawada. That woman did not deserve to be in the dark on this. No one did.

 **Storm**

Belphegor would never admit out loud how much he needed Noel. He was the prince's governess and was meant to teach him any and everything. To know he was watching Bel fight only made him push harder to win. He couldn't disgrace boss, but he never wanted Noel to think he was not in control. The man was a mother, father, and brother all in one. He was light years ahead of Bel's actual family.

He won, but he couldn't move. He heard a voice beside him. It was familiar and comforting. Whoever was speaking pulled his scarred body into their embrace. He continued to laugh as they carried him from the rubble. They were warm and familiar. This was his family. His Noel.

 **Rain**

He knew his breathing was unsteady. Tears were glossing over his eyes. There was no way this was happening. So much pride and it was getting him killed. Noel felt eyes on him as he gazed into the water of the arena. Xanxus scoffed at his lovers face before leaving, not expecting the tealette to follow.

Dino and his men worked to retrieve Squalo from the shark and were successful. He was rushed off in critical condition. Dino turned to the eerily still Noel with sympathy in his eyes. Since he met the man he picked up on quite a few things about him. The biggest being that Noel would rather be the one hurt or dead than seeing his friends and family that way. It was one of the things Dino liked about him.

He told Noel where Squalo was taken and left him behind. He knew Noel's mind was too far away at the moment to register everyone's disappearance.

 **Mist**

He couldn't bring himself to go. He didn't want to see yet another child up for slaughter against his family. His conscience was telling him this fight was wrong for both sides. Bel managed to wheel himself to the fight claiming his "need to see Mammy fight" for leaving his hospital bed. Noel could feel his moral compass tearing him in two. He would hold out, just till the end, and hope that this whole mess would clean itself up soon. Noel was feeling far too anxious.

 **Cloud**

That kid was a beast. So much anger and discipline all rolled up into one royally pissed off teenage bomb. The fight didn't last very long past the start time and Noel was not at all surprised. The teen then calls out his lover, much to Xanxus' amusement, for a fight. Then hell literally rained down. Mosca started firing and Noel was in shock dodging a stray missile as he rushed to help his family. He was so worried, but nothing prepared him for what was inside the mechanical behemoth.

Ninth. Noel was in shock. This was too much. He had taken this too far. What the fuck was Xanxus thinking?! How could he have done this? Was it all for revenge or was this a whole new grudge that had been lit aflame. Death for Nono would have been a better fate. Tears leaked out of Noel's eyes as the ninth was taken for medical treatment. He couldn't do this anymore. This whole experience showed him that maybe Xanxus didn't care about anyone anymore. No one was safe from being thrown overboard if it meant getting closer to his finish line. Not even Noel.

The tealette turned on his heels and rushed away from the battlefield, ignoring the calls from Bel. He needed to get away. He needed time.

 **Scent**

Fran had missed this even though he would never admit it, the comfort of being wrapped in his elder brother's arms. It had been years, but his scent had not changed. He tangled his small hands in the long wavy strands the same color as his own. Soft words of love and admiration trickled from the elder's lips. Noel was home with him and he was so incredibly happy. He glanced up into his brother's eyes and saw a storm of conflicting emotions, but as soon as those eyes met his nothing but love was seen. Fran didn't know where his brother had been, but all he wanted now was to hold him just a little bit longer.

 **Worry**

It had been weeks and still no contact. Xanxus was close to destroying the entire house. How could he have just disappeared? How could he have just let Noel walk off like that? His disappearance has affected every one of his guardians in some form or fashion. Belphegor was growing more hostile as the days passed, injuring more of his squad members by the day. Mammon sulked over all of the revenue he lost from selling snapshots. Lussuria would hold up in his room sewing new outfits for Noel to wear whenever he decided to return. Levi was overjoyed and suffered for it. Squalo was always on edge now that his helpful assistant was no longer there to help file the paperwork that was flooding in. No one knew how to find him and now they were practically on house arrest again. Xanxus only grew angrier and lonelier as time went on and no one could help him out of the grave he was starting to realize he dug himself into.

 **Years**

Time flew and Noel faded into the back of their minds, locked away with a key. That is until a little brat illusionist that looked eerily similar to the French man became mammon's replacement. They knew this was the darling little brother he adored to no end. Xanxus could never look at him. Belphegor practically abused him. The scab had been ripped off to reveal a fresh bloody wound. Wherever Noel was Xanxus cursed him for leaving. Fran didn't know where he was and that killed the only possible lead he had. The youth claimed that Noel said that he had something to take care of after being approached by a mysterious man. That sent off red flags in Xanxus' mind, but he didn't know how to start looking for his lost lover at this point. He would just have to wait.

 **Prisoner**

Byakuran couldn't be more pleased. The lovely creature was completely under his control. He was nothing but a slave to the Gesso leader's desires. He broke Noel's will, manipulated his mind, and shaped the man into the perfect servant. Byakuran chuckled to himself as he felt slender fingers slide across his shoulders pushing sun and rain flames into his muscles. This was how things should be. This is how they would stay.

Noel could feel his heart constricting in his chest. He deserved this punishment. He practically abandoned Xanxus at his weakest hour, all for his stupid feelings that were for nothing. He was upset for no reason and now he would never see his lover, brother, or friends again. The Varia is stronger than he made them seem way back then. He abandoned them. Noel deserved this hell.

 **Sick**

There was a burning resolve in Shoichi's eyes. He didn't want Byakuran to achieve his goals. Just seeing and hearing the malicious things he does and says to his personal slave made him push forward in his plans at a faster pace. He trained him like a dog and had the tealette beaten when he disobeyed. The worst was when he first brought him here. He forced him to the ground, stripped of all his clothes, and used a knife to slowly cut off his hair until it barely touched his ears. He cut the man's cheek several times with an unapologetic smile on his face.

The man, who was newly named Sagiso, seemed to retreat into his mind as the humiliation continued on. Shoichi felt sick watching it all and vowed to help the victim of undeserved torture make it out of here alive. He needed to get him out of this place before he lost his will to go on.

 **Rescue**

They didn't have much time before Byakuran would notice Sagiso's absence. Spanner carried the drugged man to the waiting stealth plane. Shoichi had managed to hire one to fly directly to the Varia's castle headquarters after learning the true identity of Sagiso was Noel, the partner in every sense of the word of Xanxus.

After he got the older man strapped in he sent the plane off and hurried back to his lab. Spanner let out a sigh of relief upon his return and gave him a pat on the back.

"He might not be able to say it now Sho, but I know he would thank us if he could." Spanner told him.

"I know, it was the right thing to do, it's all up to his familia now." Shoichi replied.

 **Reunion**

Xanxus scowled in irritation at the plane landing in front of his guardians outside. What the fuck was going on now? The brat in Japan never said anything about anyone coming here. The pilot gestured to open the side door so Squalo cautiously approached and, with a sword ready, opened the door only to stare at the contents of the plane in shock. He yelled to Lussuria and the flamboyant sun rushed over. Xanxus grew confused until he spotted a head of short wispy teal hair. His eyes widened in shock. It couldn't be him, not after so long.

Xanxus rushed down to the plane with his box weapon at his side. As he approached the group they all turned to him with both relief and fear in their eyes. In the arms of his right-hand man was his long lost lover being healed by Lussuria's peacock. Fran stood next to Squalo clutching Noel's hand in a shaking vice grip. He walked over and reached out to gently cup his cheek. He glanced down to see a note along with two box weapons. He picked the paper up and read it bringing a burning fury to his mind. Byakuran messed up and hurt the one person he would gladly destroy the world for. He just royally fucked up with Xanxus.

Noel slept for days with Fran and Bester at his sides. Fran clutching his brother as if he would disappear and Bester nuzzled into his master's mate's side nudging him every now and then to try and wake him. Everyone understood Fran's reasoning, after learning the dead-eyed boy was actually their friend precious brother, but Bester came as a surprise. Xanxus knew the reason though.

Hanging behind his office's desk was a large painting of Noel and him from his birthday so long ago. His elder brothers had apparently taken dozens of pictures of the two throughout the night in order to commission the painting for a late gift. He never told them how much he loved the painting. He loved to see his Noel in that dress with the same soft smile that could bring even the most stubborn of men to their knees. Bester stared at that painting every day and listened to his master explain who it was and what they were. Xanxus even gave an old shirt of Noel's to the liger to familiarize Bester with the scent. So He was not shocked to see the box animal sleeping next to his lover. Xanxus forgave Noel for running years ago. Right now he just wanted him to wake up.

 **Cats**

Noel woke to the sound of a loud rumbling purr. He immediately thought of his box animals. Babette was a possessive animal. She saw both her master Noel as well as his other box animal Dior as her children. If she ever felt threatened the rain jaguar would growl only once to get her point across before she would attack. Dior, however, was a very playful and mischievous little thing. The sun serval enjoyed being lazy and perching on window sills.

Unfortunately, it was neither of his girls that greeted him. Instead, he found himself staring down a fully grown male white lion. It stared at him before giving his face a good licking. Noel felt the giggles bubbling up before he started full on laughing. He hugged the lion's large head as it continued to lick him. The laughter startled the other body in the bed awake. Fran set his wide gaze on his elder brother and tears started to trail down his cheeks. Noel turned to see him and gave a warm smile.

"You've grown so much ma petite Sirène." Noel said.

Fran just moved to burrow himself into his older brother.

A squeal from the door alerted the brothers to the flamboyant man in the door. His box weapon strolled in passed him opening its feathers to shine sun rays on Noel.

"Lulu still as beautiful as ever and I see your box animal takes after you as well."

Lussuria rushed over to cling to Noel whining about his favorite finally coming home to him. Bester jumped off the bed and started to growl at the crowding, Noel took notice. He reached for his rings and boxes on the bedside table. He quickly opened both releasing the two wild cats within. Lussuria and Fran watched in amazement as the smaller of the cats walked right up to the cranky lion and started to cuddle against him, happily purring. The bigger of the two kept her distance, but upon seeing Bester lick the kitten, came forward to join the kitty pile.

This was the scene the rest of the Varia found the occupants in. Bel quickly joined the hugging pile, but Levi scoffed turning to walk right back out the door. Squalo laughed at the ridiculous scene. Xanxus couldn't take his eyes off Noel.

"Leave." He ordered to his officers.

They left a lot more reluctant than usual at the order especially Fran. Eventually, only Xanxus, Noel, and their snoozing cats remained. Noel studied Xanxus anxiously waiting for him to say something. After a few more awkward moments Noel finally spoke.

"You have a lock of my hair tied to yours." He said.

"I know." Xanxus smirked walking over and bending down so he was inches from his lovers face. "You will never run away from me again, unless you want me to hunt you down and drag you back and tie you to our bed, understand?"

"Yes, cher." Noel replied closing the space between them to kiss his love for the first time in years.

 **Mortality**

Fran was in danger, Bel was emotionally compromised, his brother and, practically, his son was in a fight with an arrogant little shit. He needed to help and so he rushed through the woods to reach the two. He made it just as the blonde asshole sent an attack at his brother's back. No, he wouldn't let that happen. Right before the blast of storm flames could hit, Noel jumped in front of it, the blast causing a sizable hole that went straight through his stomach. He heard the screams of Bel and Fran before he hit the ground. Fran pulled himself together enough to make a strong illusion to make it seem as if they were all hit.

When Rasiel and his butler left for the castle, Bel called in Noel's state of being mortally wounded with a shaky voice. Fran tried to use his illusions to hold his brother's body together, but it was late he has already lost so much blood. Fran was crying and shaking his head as Bel kneeled beside him in a similar state of worry. Noel smiled up at them.

"It will be fine little ones, so please don't cry over me I would never forgive myself if you both got hurt." Noel said coughing up a bit of blood. "Please tell Xanxus I'm sorry I abandoned him, It was my fault we lost all this time, Tell him I love him so much and to never forget me."

Noel coughed up more blood.

"SHUT UP YOU DONT HAVE THE PRIVILEGE TO DIE BEFORE THE PRINCE SAYS SO!" Belphegor screamed at Noel shaking him. "STOP! PLEASE STOP CLOSING YOUR EYES! DONT GO DONT LEAVE ME, DONT LEAVE US! WE NEED YOU DUMBASS!"

Fran started crying harder when he saw his brother's chest cease to rise and fall. Bel joined him in lying down beside Noel's smiling corpse. He was such an idiot. He didn't have to jump in front of them to take the brunt of the flames attack. They could only hope that the message reached Xanxus and that boss destroyed that bastard. Noel was a stupid martyr until the end.

 **Present**

Tears stained the tealette's cheeks. The memories of the future washed over him with sorrow and regret dominating his thoughts. He kissed his sleeping brother's head an rushed out of his room leaving a note on the kitchen counter. Noel left his grandmother's and hopped on the first plane to Italy.

Noel rushed into Xanxus' office and flung himself into the warmth of the person he loved. He remembers every detail of a future with a rift between them and never wanted it to come true. That would never happen this time around. Xanxus clung to him with just as much sorrow in his thoughts.

"What the fuck did I say about leaving me?" He asked his small lover.

"I'm so sorry Xanxus, I'm so so sorry." Noel cried.

Xanxus just pulled the weeping man into his lap and refused to let him go. That future would not happen; no way in hell was he letting his one piece of happiness get away from him ever again. Noel was his.

"What happens after?"Noel whispered.

"What the hell do you think, I killed that little worm, Sawada dealt with that Bya-whatever guy."

Noel laughed softly at that and curled further into the warmth of Xanxus. He glanced over his shoulder at their portrait and smiled.

"Hey Cher?" Noel asked.

"Hm?" was the reply.

"Wanna get married?"

Xanxus looked down at his lover with a contemplating look before answering.

"Ok."


	2. Yuri! on Ice AU

AN: Hey guys, here is the first of a series of AU oneshots based on Green Fairy. I hope you enjoy and thank you so much for the reviews, follows, and favorites.

"Phichit something is very wrong with Yuuri." Noel said as he gazed solemnly at the Thai skater in face time.

"I know he flubbed his jumps a lot worse than any nervous mistake would have been." Phichit replied.

Noel sighed as he made his way through the lobby of the arena. Phichit was listing off all the foods and comfort activities they would shower Yuuri with upon their return to Detroit when Noel ran into a VERY solid chest. Noel stepped back and gazed up only to stare in shock. NOEL WAS BORN TO HAVE THIS MAN'S BABIES.

"Chi-chi I'm gonna have to call you back." Noel said not looking at the screen.

"Wait What?"

Noel ended the call focusing on the tanned Adonis smirking down at him. He was shook to the core and could not think of anything but climbing this man like a tree.

"You are Noel Leclair." The mystery man said in a suave and heavy tone.

"And you're sex on legs." Noel automatically replied.

The man snorted before holding out his hand. Noel grasped it with his MUCH smaller one only for to pull it toward his lips and press a soft kiss to Noel's knuckles.

"Xanxus Crispino."

Noel was dead. He had not one but two x's in his name. If he does one more hot thing Noel swears he will melt.

"It is very pleasurable to meet you Xanxus."

Xanxus continued to smirk before snatching Noel's phone and staring at the custom cinnamon roll wearing glasses squashed between a tan hamster and a blonde cat with piercings in its ear.

"Cute." Xanxus said turning the phone over and tapping at the screen.

Noel tried to see what the other was doing but Xanxus angled his body away to prevent it. He turns back around then and places the phone into Noel's waiting hand. He leans down a bit and looks directly into Noel's wide mint green eyes.

"I'll be seeing you around kitty cat." He said placing a light teasing kiss to Noel's cheek.

Noel felt his legs quiver before he almost fell. Keyword ALMOST. Xanxus wrapped an arm around his waist to hold the skater up. Noel melted into the hard muscles he was now pressed up against.

"You ok?"

"I think I honest to God just swooned." Noel replied causing Xanxus to chuckle.

"I'm glad I could sweep you off your feet."

Noel shivered as he stood again.

"My very own Prince charming." Noel smiled up at the Italian.

A throat clearing caught the pair's attention. Noel gave a nervous smile to his coach Celestino. He gave the skater a knowing smirk.

"Let's go Noel Yuuri is waiting." He smirked at the blonde.

"Yeah, ok just give me second." Noel replied looking back up at the man holding him.

Celestino shook his head and walked off to find Yuuri. Noel licked his lips before placing his hands on the taller male's shoulders. He pulled him down far enough to whisper in his ear.

"My programs next season are going to be all about you."

He kissed the other male's cheek before backing out of his arms. He gave Xanxus a small grin before turning to follow his coach with a little extra swing in his hips. He glanced over his shoulder to see that Xanxus was still watching and gave him a wink. The other grinned back.

Noel took his phone out and opened the lock screen. His phone was pulled up on a new contact "Your Future". Noel blushed and scrolled through to see his number, email, Skype, instagram, and twitter names. Noel hoped that Adonis was at the banquet.

"Noel primped his freshly dyed hair as he gazed in the mirror. The minty teal tips matched his eyes perfectly. Yuuri sat glumly on one of the queen beds in their room. His loss was really eating at him and he still wouldn't tell Noel what was wrong. He sighed as he glanced one last time at his expensive, tailor-made to show off his ass, three piece black floral suit. He walked over to Yuuri and pulled the younger into a hug.

"I don't know what's wrong or how to fix it but just know that I am here for you Yuuri." Noel said pulling away to smile at the figure skater. "Now come on we have a gala to attend."

A buzzing from his phone caught his attention. He pulled his phone out to see who messaged him only to stare in shock.

"Holy Shit."

Yuuri looked over in confusion.

"What's wrong?"

"My future baby daddy saved his number in my phone as 'Your Future'." Noel started. "And apparently he wants me to come visit Italy during the offseason."

Yuuri stared at him incredulously.

"Are you serious right now?"

Noel turned to him with a huge grin on his face. He grabbed Yuuri's arm and dragged him out of their hotel room.

"I don't want to get up." Noel mumbled.

A deep laugh sounded from the phone pressed to Noel's ear.

"Neither do I, but you have a roommate to take care of and I have a plane to catch."

Noel grinned before looking over his shoulder at his rink mate. Yuuri had wrapped himself around Noel in his sleep. After Yuuri basically dry humped his idol Noel dragged him back to their room. They ended up passed out in a champagne-induced sleep. Noel wrapped his arm around the shorter male's waist. Yuuri was dangerous and had no idea how hard Phichit and Noel worked to protect his ass purity.

Noel grinned as he focused back on the phone.

"I'll come as soon as the season's over." Noel purred. "We can work on the baby making when I don't have a drunken Japanese boy on my back.

Xanxus got quiet before speaking again.

"You can get pregnant?" Xanxus asked confused.

"We're going to screw enough to believe I can." Noel replied cheerily. "I want a baby girl."


	3. Ouran Highschool Host Club AU

Helen was at it again. Noel hated coming to the Ouran PTA meetings. They were just glorified tea parties for lonely housewives to rich men who had no life other than to make other lonely housewives feel like shit. Helen just so happens to be the worst of the worst in this case. She was an uptight ignorant bigot and Noelle had no time for her bullshit. However, she just couldn't keep her mouth shut anytime the couple Grace the PTA with their presence.

Xanxus sat beside Noel with an indifferent look on his face. He honestly could not care about anything in the meeting but always insisted upon coming just for the show Noel no doubt put on. They were both Proxies for the head of the Kasanoda syndicate. They looked after Ritsu when his father could not and attended to these sort of things in his place often.

"I think we shouldn't allow certain children and their guardians to join the school." Helen started receiving nods and agreements from her followers. "They could poison our pure children with their unhealthy displays."

At this point, she was looking directly at Xanxus where his arm was wrapped around the back of his husband's head. She was stepping over the line.

"Oh, I almost forgot I made some wonderful brownies all on my own today." She beamed. "Unfortunately I had to sit them next to a rather unappetizing pie."

Noel narrowed his eyes. This bitch did not just say that about his dessert. Xanxus' wide eyes confirmed it for him.

"What did you say about my black cherry clafoutis?" Noel asked with an unreadable expression on his face.

"Oh was that yours dear, you really shouldn't bring such amateur creations to the meeting there is no telling what's in it and you wouldn't want to get anyone sick would you?" Helen smirked behind her tea.

Noel took a deep breath before standing. He casually made his way to the elegant food spread before approaching the brownies. He picked them up and turned around. A soft smile graced the Frenchmen's face as he casually approached the group. Xanxus grinned disturbingly as his husband stopped directly in front of the group. Noel casually flipped the brownie tin onto the pink marble floor splattering the brownie in front of Helen. The resounding clang from the tin being cast aside sounded throughout the room. The wives all gasped at Noel's actions. Xanxus leaned forward even more interested than before. Noel's voice was calm and collected as he addressed the rude woman.

" Fuck you and your dry box mix brownies Helen. Unlike you, I slaved over a hot stove and made sure every ingredient that went into my dessert was fresh and didn't insult the people here by constantly bringing the exact same thing to every meeting. I will not sit here and let you insult me, my husband, the kid who is basically our child, and my cooking. I do not take kindly to rude people. In fact, I tend to rip them apart for that rudeness. So what do you have to say for yourself Helen what could you possibly have to say? I'm sorry for giving you all cheap brownies, I'm sorry that I open my big mouth every time I come to these meetings, sorry I was brought into this world as the bigoted stereotype that makes it hard for real women to be appreciated. You are nothing, your children are monsters, and your husband is more than likely having an affair with the pool boy that your so called friend circle knows about and laughs at you for behind your back."

Noel walked closer to Helen avoiding the dried mud she called a dessert and got right in the PTA chairman's face.

"Now I shall ask you once more, what did you say about my black cherry clafoutis?"

Helen shook in fear under the intense gaze. Her eyes began to tear up. Noel scoffed at her.

" You are just a lowly bitch with nothing better to do than putting others down. One day you are going to pay for everything you've said and everything you've done. You're going to piss off the wrong person and embarrass your husband and your children to the point that he'd cut you off and you'll be nothing but a penniless nobody. And when that day comes I'll be there to watch you, mock you, and laugh until I see nothing but tears and no hope left in your eyes, and I can't wait."

The PTA gasped at his declaration. Xanxus pulled himself together from his poorly hidden laugh fest and walked up to his husband.

"Come on Noel let's go home." He said softly to his husband as he tugged him away.

He leaned up and started speaking in Italian.

"She's just another jealous cow wanting to be you. Need any help making your wish become reality"

" I already know it's a reality, in fact, I'm the one who recommended the pool cleaners to her husband and specifically told him to ask for said pool boy he's having an affair with now we needed was this meeting to occur and the Dominos will surely have tipped." Noel grinned up at his husband. " after all she called our baby a low life who corrupt the innocent when he himself is just an innocent little angel I couldn't just let her get away with insulting our family."

Noel smirked looking back at Helen and the rest of the hens that clucked around her.

"We shall see you, ladies, next month. I'll be sure to bake something else since my pie was unappetizing."

Xanxus barely made it out of the library without laughing at his husband. He knew Noel was going to make that women's life hell until Ritsu graduated.

"We can only hope she never bakes another brownie again." Noel smiled up at his husband.

"You just might have to serve her at the next bake sale ."


	4. World of Warcraft AU

"I can't believe I let you drag me back to this shithole." A gruff voice complained.

"Stop moping Xan you wanted to come with me on this trip." A softer voice replied. "I told you I had a request for Fel lotus you could have stayed back home if you wanted.

The voices belonged to two very different beings. The first was a large hunk of walking muscles better known as an orc. His hair was black and shaggy, the length stopping at the base of his thick neck. A brightly colored array of feathers was tied to a bundle of the thick strands. The orc's skin was a light umber littered with pale scars of various sizes. He clutched a menacing shotgun in both hands. A scowl was set firmly on his face emphasizing his large tusks. A white male lion loyally followed at the orc's heels.

The second was much smaller in size and lithe in shape. At first glance, the figure could easily be mistaken for a woman with their narrow waist and smaller build, but up close they are obviously male. Their chest was flat and shoulders broad. A hood covered their head only revealing the glow of eerie acidic green eyes, a long thick ash blonde braid stopping at their navel, and a long pair of pointed ears. The elf sported a pair of wicked looking daggers on his hips. They were currently making their way through the Terrokkar Forrest.

"Trash should get it themselves." The orc grunted.

"Xanxus dear please lighten up, the sooner we find the herbs the sooner we can get back to our apartment." The elf replied in a fond tone.

"Noel just shut up and find the damn thing Bester needs to eat."

Noel smiled beneath his hood. He knew Xanxus wasn't going to let him go off on his own to another dimensional plane. They had been together for years, having met during Brewfest after the fall of Lord Kael'thas Sunstrider. He could still (barely) remember being drunk on several tankards of Shimmer Stout and challenging the orc, and his pretty kitty, to a duel. Xanxus had reluctantly agreed with the sparkly elf and took him out with a stampede of various colored cats. It was not Noel's finest moment, but it was the start of a very passionate and humorous relationship.

It was a rough long distance relationship and caused the two to become well known with the goblins that ran the zeppelins. Noel had lived in Silvermoon, while Xanxus resided in Orgrimmar. It was after a year that they decided to live together. Noel moved to Durotar and they settled in the cliffs of the Northern Barrens. Unfortunately, when the Cataclysm tore through the land they had no choice but to flee on the backs of Xanxus' black drake and Noel's Dragonhawk with anything they could save. They moved from inn to inn not making a permanent home anywhere. Xanxus put all of his pets but Bester in the stables. Noel took up a job of finding rare herbs for alchemists and tailors. They made the most of their situation.

When the Pandaren arrived they saw their chance to rebuild. Pandaria was beautiful and offered a similar peace that their Northern Barrens home had provided. They gained permission to settle on a cliff side overlooking Serenity Falls. Xanxus gathered more cats for his hunter stable and Noel started training with the Order of the Cloud Serpent. Their life was calm again and not even news of the Legion's return and a new Warchief could stop their relaxed life.

"Hey, is this it?" Xanxus asked snapping Noel out of his reminiscing.

Noel walked over and gathering the herbs and inspecting them. He grinned when he finally tugged out the roots.

"You are amazing dear." Noel laughed.

"I know." Xanxus scoffed pulling out his hearthstone. "Now let's go."

Noel pulled out his own stone and activated it. He was engulfed in a warm blue light and a tug in his belly made him aware of the teleportation. When he opened his eyes he was standing in front of Brewmother Kiki.

"Welcome back." She smiled ushering him to the bar as Xanxus and Bester appeared.

"So did you find the herbs?" She asked pouring him a tankard of Honeydew's finest.

"Of course." Noel replied pulling down his hood to reveal a soft and effeminate face.

"Whatever just go and mail that shit so we can go home." Xanxus huffed swiping his lover's drink and gulping it down.

Noel chuckled before setting down some gold for Kiki and heading outside to the post box. Xanxus nodded to the kind matron before leaving his seat to follow Noel. He made his way over to the stable and grabbed his giant gray wolf, Bella. He hopped on her saddle giving her a good scratch behind the ears. Noel approached a few minutes later and cooed at the wolf giving her a pat and a handful of jerky from his bag. He smiled up at Xanxus before hopping on behind the orc. Xanxus clicked his tongue signaling the overgrown puppy to start running. Bester ran faithfully alongside his master.

"So what's next for you Xanxus?" Noel asked as he perched his chin on the thick shoulder in front of him.

"I heard there is some guy on the isle of giants with white raptors." Xanxus replied.

"Let me guess." Noel smiled kissing his lover's neck. "You want one and will do anything to get it.

"No Shit." Xanxus said back as he tugged on Bella's reigns to slow them down.

They trotted down the stone path until they reached their home. A series of purrs greeted them as Xanxus' heard of wild cats rushed to greet them. A pitter patter of rushing steps sounded from inside.

"Daddy, Papa your home!" A happy voice squealed excitedly.

The couple smiled as their little Pandaren Cub came barreling out to them happy to have her parents home.


	5. Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun AU

AN: Hey everyone, this is a bonus AU that was brought up by Evilshallprevail. I love Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-Kun and after I read their comment I was invested in making something for it. So here you go and feel free to suggest some fandoms. I am only doing 15 in all, but I do plan on multiple chapters involving them once the 15 are chosen. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy.

"Hey, Nozaki-Kun?" Chiyo called to the stoic teen.

"Hm?" He replied as he continued working across the room.

"I know Mikorin is your reference for Mamiko and Suzuki is based on Kashima." She started turning to look over at the teen. "But who did you reference for when they were together?"

Nozaki paused in his work and turned to look at Chiyo with a furrowed brow. Hori looked up from the classroom he was sketching out to stare at Nozaki with wide eyes. He had never thought about it before, but now he was very curious.

"I mean you had to come up with all the romantic poses for them somewhere right?" She pressed.

Nozaki sighed and nodded in response.

"I'll show you at school tomorrow, but you might want to prepare for anything." He said cryptically.

"What do you mean anything?" Hori asked in confusion.

"You'll see." Nozaki stated turning back to his storyboard.

The lunch bell had rung and Nozaki found himself surrounded by not only and anxious Chiyo and Hori, but also a curious Mikoshiba. He looked at the group and nodded signaling for the group to follow him. Nozaki made his way through a maze of hallways and passed many doors before coming to a stop outside the home-economics room.

Nozaki knocked on the door before sliding it open to reveal Two adults in the middle of a heavy make-out session. They didn't seem to hear the knocking on the door. All of the other teens were in shock at the sight before them. Mikoshiba flushed an alarming shade of red at the soft moans coming from the body pressed back onto one of the counters. Hori's jaw dropped. Chiyo was trying her best to avoid looking in the couple's direction. Nozaki didn't even seem phased. In fact, he seemed to like this was just an everyday thing. He cleared his throat causing the couple to tense up and pause in their actions. The larger of the two stood up fully allowing the smaller to push them off the counter. The taller turned around to reveal the tan ruggedly handsome features of Xanxus-Sensei the scary 3rd year foreign language teacher. Hori's face went ghost white upon seeing the scowl on his face. The smaller stepped out from behind him to show that they were Noel-sensei the home-ec teacher. Both were from Europe and insisted on students calling them by their first name. Noel-sensei smiled upon seeing his students.

"Nozaki-Kun, did you need more help with your manga?" He asked as if he hadn't just been bent over a table top.

"Yeah, and I also wanted my assistants to meet you." He replied gesturing to his helpers.

Noel grinned as he leaned into his silent partner's side.

"Lovely to see you all outside of class everyone, you do wonderful work for Nozaki-Kun."

"Yeah." Xanxus added pulling a nearby chair over to sit in.

"So, what do you need us to do?" Noel asked sitting on the arm of the chair.

Nozaki pulled out a notebook and carded through the pages until he found what he was looking for.

"I need to take photos, and sketches if you have time, of you guys in two poses." Nozaki stated. "I need Suzuki holding Mamiko by the waist and grasping her chin as Mamiko looks away, and I need Mamiko kissing Suzuki's cheek as she clasped her hands in front of her nervously."

Xanxus gave an affirmative grunt before standing from his chair.

"Sit down, we have time for you to draw a few things." Xanxus grumbled out pulling Noel to the head of the class.

The students all sat at a nearby table as Nozaki moved around his teachers shifting their positioning until he was satisfied with the pose. He sat in the vacated chair and took a few pictures before sketching out his characters in the poses. Everyone was shocked. How long had they been doing this for Nozaki? They seemed so used to him correcting their stance and his blunt speech.

"HOW DID THIS EVEN START!?" Mikoshiba exclaimed.

Nozaki shrugged before replying.

"I walked in on them a few times so I blackmailed them into being reference models and Noel-Sensei also helps with screen tones."

"WHAT!" Everyone exclaimed.

*FLASHBACK*

Nozaki was in the library searching for books he could use as reference. He wandered back to a very isolated part of the library. He suddenly heard soft grunts and moans coming from the next row. Nozaki was curious so he pushed some books aside a peeked through. He was shocked upon seeing his teacher pressed up against the wall by another faculty member. Noel was arched into the other man in a heated kiss. His legs wrapped tightly around the other's waist.

"Um, excuse me." Nozaki called causing the couple to freeze.

They snapped their heads to see him on the other side of the shelf. Nozaki waved at them.

"I'm pretty sure this isn't allowed on school property, but I won't tell if you do me a favor."

The other teacher scowled at Nozaki as Noel tilted his head in confusion.

"What do you want brat." The other teacher growled.

"I need figure models." Nozaki stated bluntly.

"…"

"…"

"…..What?" The teachers asked in disbelief.

Chiyo stared at Nozaki with disbelief. He really blackmailed his teacher's into doing all of this.

"It's not so bad." Noel smiled as he was readjusted for Nozaki's next sketch.

"It isn't?" Hori questioned.

"Of course not, I find it fun to help out my favorite student." Noel replied.

Xanxus snorted looking down at his lover.

"You only say that cause the brat got one over on you." He stated. "You would kick his ass for even thinking of blackmailing us if he wasn't a student."

"So true." Noel smiled placing a kiss on Xanxus' cheek and holding the pose for Nozaki to draw.

Chiyo, Hori, and Mikoshiba stared in shock at their teacher's statement.

'HE SAID THAT SO INNOCENTLY!'


	6. Harry Potter AU

There was something weird about the teal haired Hufflepuff. James couldn't put his finger on it but just instinctively knew. He was apparently friends with not only the weird Ravenclaw Xenophilius Lovegood but also the two slimy snakes Malfoy and snivilus. The other puffs treated him as if he was a God. Anything he asked they did no questions asked. It was terrifying. James needed to know what was wrong with That Puff.

The Puff was sitting alone on the pier of the black lake. This was James chance to figure the creep out. Under the invisibility cloak, He snuck up to the pier and hid behind one of the supports. He had a good view of the upperclassmen as well as something else that left James speechless. In the lake below the other student was a mermaid. Only her head was visible as she conversed with the student in loud sharp screeches. THEY WERE SPEAKING MERMISH! How the bloody hell did the Hufflepuff learn to do that? James shifted causing the dock to creak. The other student's head turned slowly in the Gryffindor's direction. His eerie mint green eyes scanned the area before snapping behind James.

"It is incredibly rude to sneak up on people darling." The Puff said with a fond smile. "I was in a rather in-depth conversation with this lovely creature."

"Sounded like nails on a fucking board to me." A gruff voice replied stepping into James' view.

It was the scary ass Slytherin that The Marauders had officially called off any pranks on. Xanxus No name. He was banished from his family for refusing his marriage contracts for someone. No one ever found out who the Slytherin's partner was. Judging by the soft peck the weird Hufflepuff just gave him James had a positive idea of who it was.

"Well, under the water it's simply gorgeous." The teal haired male said waving to the retreating mermaid.

"Thought you only knew Gobbledygook?" Xanxus asked wrapping an arm around the other.

"I know several languages dear even Aves."

Xanxus scoffed. "So you talk to birds and shit like a Disney princess?"

James jumped at the sound of the Hufflepuff's laughter. He had never heard the weirdo laugh let alone cracked a smile. It was high and had a bell like quality to it.

"So are you gonna let that stalker keep watching you?" Xanxus asked. " I really wanna knock his teeth down his throat."

James gulped in fear as he started easing his way back toward the land. He knew Xanxus was talking about him.

"I find it humorous to see his attempts at assessing me darling." The Puff replied.

"Noel that kid is nothing but trouble." Xanxus grunted pushing his face in his lover's neck.

Noel. The Hufflepuff was named Noel. It seemed too soft for someone like him. He seemed more like a Damien or Lucifer to James. Something dark that said 'I have a cult and I will sick them on you.' James finally reached the land and quickly rushed for the castle hoping the two didn't see his fleeing form.

Upon entering Gryffindor Tower he spotted the rest of the Marauders in the common room. He rushed to them desperate to reveal his newfound knowledge.

"Pads, Mooney, Wormtail you will not believe what I just found out!" James grinned. "The Slytherin Xanxus is with the creepy Hufflepuff."

The three teen stared at their friend in shock.

"What?" Remus asked in disbelief and confusion.

James hopped on the sofa beside Sirius before going into detail about what he witnessed at the lake. His friends hung onto every bit of the information before deciding that they would finally prank the Puff.

"We could cast that charm that turns your skin weird colors." Remus smiled.

"Or slip exploding fairy dust in his food." Peter meekly supplied.

"No." Sirius started. " We need something better for the creep."

"Grander." James nodded.

"More spectacular." Sirius added turning to James with a grin.

"The greatest spectacle of all of our pranks so far." James said turning to his friend with a mirrored look on his face.

"I know just the spectacle." The two said as one causing the other Marauder's to shiver in pity for the upperclassmen.

The Marauders set up their prank before the other students came down for dinner. They say quietly at their table, conveniently in a spot with a good view of Noel's seat. When the feast appeared the Puff started to put food on his plate and seemed unknowing of the charm and the potion coating his goblet.

Noel lifted his goblet to his lips and sipped before pulling back and staring at the cup. James and Sirius frowned. Why did Noel stop drinking? The Hufflepuff tilted his head in curiosity before sniffing his drink. His eyes snapped open and a feral smirk stretched across his face. He looked up making eye contact with The pranksters before downing the giblets contents. He licked his lips and shivered as the potion worked through his system. A scowl crossed his soft features proving the potion was working. Noel gasp alerting his housemates of his pain. They fussed over him causing a scene in the great hall.

James nudged Remus to put the finishing touch on their prank. Remus nods before quietly casting his charm. A shriek alerted the entire hall to the puffs. Noel stood from his seat to reveal his new 'assets'. A pair of modest-sized breasts now graced Noel's form along with wider hips. All of it generously encased within a glittery hot pink playsuit.

Xanxus stormed over to his boyfriend and upon seeing him could only stare in shock.

"Don't get used to this new body darling." Noel said in his now sweet feminine voice. "I am not keeping my stalker's little gifts."

At his words Xanxus turned his attention to James, He glared the younger boy down before giving him a look that could only be read as 'You are fucked.'


	7. Hannibal AU

Noel smiled at his host. Hannibal was going to serve a glorious feast soon. However, he could tell his friend's mind was far away from his future dinner party plans. In fact, he believed they were on a certain curly haired FBI agent.

"You know he is even cuter under that scruff." Noel said causing Hannibal's brows to furrow in confusion. "He basically de-ages10 years any time he shaves."

"Where exactly are you taking this Noel?" Hannibal asked as he continued to grind meat for sausages.

"Il serait très utile à vos enseignements, mon cher." Noel said with a small grin. "Tous vos enseignements."

Hannibal turned to his ash blonde companion. He had known the other for over 6 years, having met him in Paris, and had never been able to tell what the younger man was thinking. He and his husband were close friends and confidants of Hannibal's. Their darker side was just as beautiful as his. They were brilliant at forgeries and seemed to control a majority of the organized crime in Baltimore. They covered up Hannibal's work when he needed to push police further off his trail and in return he cooked for them once a week and had a special wine created for the two that they adored. However, Hannibal had no idea that Noel knew Will.

"How do you know dear Will?" Hannibal asked not bothering to hide his interest in the agent.

Noel grinned, a flash of something sinister shot through his eyes.

"We met in school. I lived in Louisiana for several years of my youth and met Will in middle school." Noel started leaning against the counter opposite his host. "Want some info on your 'Dear Will'?"

Hannibal gave his companion a bored stare as he gathered the finished meat to store in his freezer. Noel snickered before continuing.

"He likes to fish, in fact, he's pretty damn good at it. I know he makes his own lures as well, but I'm sure you already knew that." The blonde said taking a sip of his wine. "If you are truly serious about him Xanxus and I can help push him into your playing field. His mind is an interesting thing to witness at work."

Noel sat his empty glass in front of his host before pushing up the sleeves of his burgundy V-neck. He walked around the counter to wash his hands. Hannibal had started cutting some meat into cubes and glanced curiously over at his guest. Noel wandered back over and started to chop the herbs Hannibal had set aside.

"What will you do when you have him?" Noel asked.

"Not if?" Hannibal questioned.

"I know you dear." Noel said in amusement. "You probably already have that sweet little lamb under your wolfish suggestions."

Hannibal smiled adding his meat into a food processor along with the herbs Noel chopped.

"I only want what is best for him." he said turning on the food processor.

"Don't we all want what's best for precious Will." Noel grinned.

Xanxus tugged at his steel gray tie as he checked himself over in the mirror. His black suit jacket was left open to give him a casual yet formal look. Noel sat patiently at the foot of their bed admiring his partner. His plum colored suit was fitted and clean cut to accentuate his legs and trim waist.

"Did you deal with those idiots at the docks yet love?" Noel asked standing from his seat.

"Yeah, shouldn't have any more issues with them." Xanxus replied turning to his husband. "I demoted that trash who was starting shit with the Irish."

Noel smiled wrapping his arms around the older male's waist. He placed a kiss on Xanxus' neck before looking up into his wine red eyes.

"Good, and if he steps out of line again…" Noel started as he pulled Xanxus down to his eye level. "Put several bullets in that fucker's brain."

Xanxus leaned forward and pressed several slow open mouth kisses to the other's lips. He pulled back and smirked at Noel's pout.

"You're hot when you talk murder." Xanxus said releasing the other.

Noel stepped backward grinning up at the Italian.

"Damn straight. Now let's go Hannibal invited Mrs.Komeda and I need to soak up that woman's energy."

"Don't you mean her limitless praise you arrogant little shit?" Xanxus smirked.

"Look who's talking." Noel replied leaving their bedroom.

The room clapped in praise of the bountiful feast laid before them. Hannibal smiled at his guests from the head of the table. Hannibal's hand rose and the applause came to an end.

"Before we begin you must all be warned…" Hannibal started. "Nothing here is vegetarian, Bon Appetite."

He grabbed his wine raising the glass causing everyone to mimic his actions. Everyone drank and started digging into the fine dishes laid before them. Noel tilted his head toward Xanxus with a smirk on his face.

"Mi chiedo quanto sono scortesi che dovrebbero essere serviti in modo così bello?" He whispered.

"Probabilmente tagliato in linea al macellaio male." Xanxus snorted downing his wine.

Noel laughed before turning to their host.

"As usual you have outdone yourself dear." Noel grinned. "I am glad I was able to help you earlier even if only a little."

Hannibal smirked at the mischief in Noel's eyes.

"I welcome you to join me again, your knife ability was very impressive."

"Coming from you that is the highest of compliments." Noel grinned leaning onto Xanxus' shoulder. "You certainly know how to make a man blush."

Alana Bloom overheard this and turned a curious eye to the long haired male and his partner. She smiled at him but it didn't reach her eye.

"Excuse me but may I ask your names you look so familiar?" She asked.

Noel turned to her with a disarming grin. Xanxus gave her a blank stare as he shifted to accommodate his leaning spouse.

"We are Xanxus and Noel Vongola, a pleasure to meet you ."

(Google Translations because I can't speak French or Italian)

"Il serait très utile à vos enseignements, mon cher." - He would benefit greatly from your teaching, my dear.

"Tous vos enseignements." - All of your teachings.

"Mi chiedo quanto sono scortesi che dovrebbero essere serviti in modo così bello?" - I wonder how rude they were to be served in such a fine way?

"Probabilmente tagliato in linea al macellaio male." - Probably cut in line at the butcher bad.


	8. Dragon Age Inquisition AU

He will break these chains that bind him. The heads of his captors would roll. He was tired of being a windup toy for monarchies. He will be free.

Noel held his head high as he was lead through the streets of Redcliffe. He could feel the eyes of curious and fearful humans. The elves could only look on with knowing and pity. Noel did not want or need their pity, but he could understand it. His body had none of the muscle mass the males of his race were expected to have. Years of being starved and forced into submission left his 6'10 frame more elf like than Qunari. His white hair flowed down his back in a thick wavy mass. A few strands framed his gentle face. It emphasized the fact that one of his curled, ram like, Horns was broken off leaving a jagged nub ending just above his ear.

Since he was a small child, barely over 3 years old, his human captors had trained him to be nothing more than entertainment. No one would help him and he never had the full strength the escape. They drugged his food often to keep him compliant. At the moment he was basically a walking puppet that could barely keep it's eyes focused. His "master" guided him into Redcliffe's tavern with a misdirecting smile.

He was sat in a chair as his captor greeted the man he had come to see, Another rich nobleman who gets off on subjugation. Noel struggles to keep his eyes open as the men talk. The sound of a chair scraping harshly against the wood floor attracted his attention for barely a second before he felt someone's huge hands grabbing his face.

"Can you hear me?" A large grayish blob spoke to him.

Noel gave a slow nod in reply. The blob tilted his head up and looked over his face.

"Boss he's been heavily drugged." The voice said in shock. "Looks like a dangerously high dose of blood lotus."

"Let's get him back to Haven and have the healers look after him." A determined female voice replied.

Another blob joined the grey one and lifted him from the chair. He could hear the angry shouts of his captor as he was lead from the tavern. He was lifted up onto a saddle and settled in front of a hard body. The last thing his mind registered was the whine of a horse before he blacked out.

"When do you think he will awaken?" Iron Bull questioned the healer.

"Any day now, thank the maker we were able to flush the poison from his system." They replied placing a damp cloth to the sleeping Qunari's head.

He nodded and left the quarters to meet up with his men. Seeing one of his kind in such a weakened state was jarring. Even female Qunari filled out more than the thin male the inquisitor and he had saved. His captors must have stunted the poor kid's growth.

Bull approached his chargers only to see them picking on their favorite moody dwarf exile, Xanxus.

"Was it love at first sight Xan?" Krem heckled.

"It certainly looked that way to me." Dalish added slapping the short man on the shoulder.

Xanxus scowled at the two before shaking off the elf's hand. The rouge moved to walk past Bull but was stopped by the Qunari's hand.

"He hasn't woken yet, but I'm sure you couldn't care less." Bull grinned at the tan dwarf.

"Whatever." Xanxus grunted heading inside of the encampment.

The Dwarf made his way through Haven until he reached the infirmary. He entered to see that the resting Qunari had yet to wake up. He moved toward the bad and sat down on the stool beside it. He slowly reached out and ran his fingers across the lavender tinted skin. He took in all the scars that marked up the others skin. This creature was beautiful and he desperately wanted him to wake up. Xanxus remembered seeing his boss ride up with this beauty laying in front of him. He saw how small he was compared to boss and immediately knew something was wrong. Someone would pay for whatever pain his beauty was dealt. His hand raised toward the sleeping man's horns, but froze mid-way. The Qunari's large eyes had snapped open and were watching him with caution and slight awe. Xanxus retracted his arm and sat up straight.

"I'm not going to hurt you." Xanxus said.

"What are you?" The male asked in a voice like thick honey.

Xanxus' heart damn near stopped at the sound. Then he realized what the Qunari asked him.

"You don't know what a dwarf is?" Xanxus asked.

"This is my first time being outside of Orleis." He started off slowly. "My captors kept me away from non-humans after a group of Elves tried to help me escape when I was a child."

Xanxus grit his teeth. Who would hurt this ethereal creature? Xanxus would put several bullets through their skull. The taller male shifted to sit up in bed and stare curiously down at the dwarf.

"What do they call you dwarf? I am called Noel" He said.

"Xanxus." The dwarf replied.

The lavender skinned Qunari stood up and smiled at the shorter male.

"I like you Xanxus the Dwarf. Your looks are appealing to me and I find you irresistibly adorable" Noel said placing his hand on Xanxus' cheek. "Would you allow me to stay with you?"

Xanxus' brain short circuited. This beauty with mile long legs he desperately wanted to run his tongue along wanted to be with him. Noel let out a giggle and kneeled in front of him to be somewhat on his level and placed a kiss to the dwarf's cheek.

"There's no rush." Noel smiled.

Xanxus smirked at the taller male. He really hoped the inquisitor could close the rift, because he wanted to take his time getting to know this lovely being.


	9. Kuroko no Basuket AU

"You're a naughty little kitty aren't you?" A tan teen smirked down at the long haired male.

"Meow." The teal haired manager of kirisaki-daichi replied winking at him with a coy smile.

A gagging sound was heard from behind the ebony haired teen as several of his underclassmen gave him grossed out expressions from his flirting. Xanxus huffed reaching up to grab a green haired player's head and ruffling his locks.

"Don't worry kid when you're all grown up you'll understand." He said teasing the first year.

Midorima shoved his hand off with a scowl.

" Please refrain from touching me."

"Get some Yōsei-chan!" Was heard from the other side of the court drawing both teams attention.

Hara was grinning at the tealette as the freshman of Kiridai frowned at their manager's behavior. Noel ignored them in favor of raking his eyes up and down Xanxus.

"You'll understand when you grow up children." He smiled.

Noel tugged his hair out of its bun to cascade down his back in large waves. He made his way across the gym and stopped barely an inch from Xanxus. He placed a hand on the taller male's chest and leaned forward inhaling his scent. Noel snuggled his face into the tan teen and let out a rumbling sigh of content.

"So kitty can purr too." Xanxus chuckled.

"He can also claw at your back." Noel said looking up at xanxus with mischievous eyes. "Wanna feel baby?"

Xanxus gave the shorter male a wide grin.

"Hell yeah."

Noel giggled before turning to face his smirking captain.

"Mako-chan i'm leaving with this gorgeous thing, can you hold down the fort for the rest of the game?" Noel asked with big wet kitten eyes.

The Kiridai captain snickered before nodding in agreement.

"Go for it Noel."

The tealette grinned before dragging the tan god out of the gym. The players of Shuutoku were confused until they realised what they had just witnessed. They let out enraged cries as one of their oldest players was led out of the gym.

Noel and Xanxus were one of the most disgusting couples to see out in public together. Most thought that the two were just a lovey-dovey pair who couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Those close to the couple knew the very dark truth. Xanxus and Noel only did what they did to fuck with everyone around them.

The Kirisaki-Daichi regulars were not at all shocked by their manager's actions. They discovered in their freshman year that Noel definitely had a type. His previous partners, male and female alike, all had the look of a future yakuza. He went for the dangerous looking ones with the demonic presence. The ebony haired senior from opposing team fit that to a t. The Shuutoku Captain approached Hanamiya with a frown on his face.

"Did you plan that?" He asked.

"Believe it or not not." Hanamiya laughed. "That was all our manager and your player."

Xanxus stretched out on his bed with a grin. He turned his head to face the beds other occupant. Noel smirked at him before sitting up on his knees. A mischievous glint took over his eyes as he straddled the tan teens hips. He leaned down closer causing his hair to fall over his shoulders like a thick curtain.

"What now?" Noel asked tilting his head.

"Whatever you want." Xanxus replied.

"Whatever I want?" Noel perked up.

"Mnhm." Xanxus hummed rubbing circles on the pale waist of his lover.

"Well, I want to go get a shit ton of junk food, come back here, curl up on this bed with you, and pig out watching trashy horror movies." Noel grinned.

"I can do that." Xanxus rumbled leaning up to place a harsh kiss to the underside of the tealettes jaw.

Noel grinned hopping out of the bed to make his way to the kitchen. Xanxus couldn't help noticing he had yet to put on a shirt. His slender boyfriend danced through the apartment only in his very short lounge shorts. Xanxus was not going to pass up a day of watching that gorgeous ass sway in his home.

Xanxus rushed to the living room after grabbing the worst movies he owned only to pause at the ringing of a phone. He heard Noel answer with a prickly hello. The tan teen entered the room to the sight of His little fairy standing defensively with a cold smile. Xanxus was going to ask what was wrong before a sharp laugh escaped the pale teen.

"If you think you're more fit for the job then by all means ask Hanamiya to test you. I'm so very sure you'll succeed in making yourself look like a dick." Noel smirked. "I wish you well in your attempt to push me from the team bitch."

That look was doing things to Xanxus and all those things would no doubt lead to Noel pressed into his bed sheets. Xanxus set the movies on the coffee table before moving to stand behind his vindictive lover. He started to place little kisses onto the shorter teens shoulder when his phone started to ring. Xanxus growled in irritation as he snatched it up and answered it.

"WHAT!" He snarled out ignoring his boyfriends giggles.

"Now Xan-Xan is that anyway to speak to your favorite 1st year?" an amused voice chirped. "Let me guess I interrupted your time with your new kitten."

"You're a little shit Takao." Xanxus growled hearing the smirk in his underclassmen's voice.

Noel smiled nuzzling into his boyfriend's shoulder. He dragged his nails down Xanxus' side teasingly.

"Hang up." Noel whispered in his ear.

Xanxus looked down at the tealette with wide eyes. Takao had heard Noel and started laughing in the receiver.

"Xan-Xan you're not actually gonn…." Xanxus ended the call.

He tossed his phone on the couch before tugging the shorter male back into his bedroom. Noel gave him a wicked smile full of promises.

"Half-time over baby, kitty wants to play."


	10. Kingsman AU

Merlin sighed in exasperation as his shorter companion beamed up at him. He knew that the smaller man was going to scar one of the candidates for life.

"You should really come over to see our new renovations. Harry has already visited and really liked how Xanxus redid the kitchen." Noel smiled.

"I'm sure he has lad." Merlin grimaced.

"He especially loved the hidden gun compartments we installed in the white Bianco Carrara marble counter tops." Noel gushed.

Merlin just knew that the newly wed couple had shelled out well over half a million on their gigantic kitchen alone. They were the type to not even bat an eye when it came to living in comfort and luxury. He also knew, because he saw the invoice for $25,000, that Xanxus would pay any amount of money to have Noel walk around Kingsman headquarters with a giant diamond engagement ring shaped like a bloomin chrysanthemum. It was the most over the top way to stake claim to someone and Merlin didn't want to touch that with a 10 foot pole. He had only ever called them out on their excessive buying once. It earned him a week's worth of target kills covered in glitter. The clean up teams were not amused.

Noel had just started describing their new spa grade bathtub when the new recruits arrived before them with their puppies. Merlin cleared his throat causing Noel to school his features to a bored stare.

"Everyone allow me to introduce you to The Lady of the Lake." Merlin announced stepping aside to allow the willowy man with dyed teal hair to come forward. His face was soft in appearance as he gazed at the applicants in boredom.

He made quite the sight for the younger candidates before him. His hair hung freely around him cascading down his back in thick waves. The standard Kingsman glasses perched on his nose were a bright canary yellow as opposed to the standard black. A matching blazer was thrown on over what appeared to be a well worn slate gray t-shirt with a cartoon mermaid printed on the front. A fitted pair of tailored black cuffed slacks revealed a glittery scale pattern that decorated the inside of the pants. On his feet were a pair of cute off-white trainers with suspicious red stains decorating the toe of each. All in all he didn't make for a very intimidating sight at first glance. If you paid close enough attention you would see several knives were strapped to various parts of his body hidden by clothes and hair but revealed if you paid enough attention when he moved. Other than his ring the only jewelry he wore was a locket around his neck that just so happened to contain several tiny syringes filled with snake venom. It was a gift just like every other weapon on his person. He was very armed and extremely dangerous.

"Hello kingsman candidates, I am pleased to see such a young crop of hopefuls with us this time around." He said with his heavy french accent reading from a slip of paper he had pulled from his back pocket. "I am The Lady of the Lake your weapon and gear manufacturer, Every suit, shoe, and tool used by our agents currently are designed by me."

"How does a Frenchman end up creating weapons for the British?" A man snorted cockily.

"I don't know Mr.Hesketh, how did your maman take giving birth to a pile of horse shit?" The Lady replied with an irritated snort.

The surrounding candidates snickered at the retort. Eggsy grinned at the sassy Frenchman as he waited for the rest of the introductions to be made.

"All of your gear from here on out shall come from me." The Lady started. "If you break something you pay, If you lose something you pay, and if you decide to take anything extra from the equipment hall other than what you were instructed to take…."

"Let me guess, We'll pay." Charlie laughed.

The Lady turned to him with a cold stare. He walked forward slowly until he was only a few feet away from the smart mouth candidate.

"No, I'm going to send Morgan Le Fay after you to extract you spinal cord from your living body; and I'll sit there with my copy of French Vouge and a very large glass of imported Sauvignon Blanc and I Will laugh my little French ass off while you scream bloody fucking murder." The Lady stated calmly to his face. "Now, do you still want to take equipment without permission Hesketh?"

"No,sir." Charlie answered nervously.

"Good." The Lady smirked turning his back on the younger man. "Now I'm sure you're ready to get on with the rest of your tasks but we must go over proper check out protocols."

The Frenchman tapped of few times at his small tablet screen before reading out a very long and no less threatening list of rules implied to the equipment room. Merlin had managed to sneak out three rules into the shorter man's list. It was over an hour before he finally voiced the very last thing on the list.

"And finally we come to the very last rule; do not, and I must repeat myself because I cannot repeat myself enough on this matter, do not fucking alter a single thing about the equipment. No paint, no Glitter, no charms, no electronic enhancements. Do not fuck with my design. Do you understand?"

No one answered him.

" I said do you fucking understand me?" The Lady grit it out with a harsh glare in his eyes.

"Yessir." The candidates called out in unison.

"Good, now I'm sure Merlin has something for you to do so why don't you take your little pups and get the hell out of here, I have things to do that are far more important than dealing with you. Dismissed."

The candidates could not have rushed out quick enough.


	11. Naruto AU

"I hate that smug self-serving son of a bitch." Noel growled as he forced his way into the home of one of his few friends.

Shibi Aburame was a patient man, but it all flew out the window when the teal haired jonin was involved. He sighed settled in to listen to the newest rant about the council. He wished that Noel would forget about him like everyone else seemed to. Shibi resigns himself to pour a drink for them both. He would definitely need it.

"He had the nerve to try and poach my students from me! He literally came up as if he was my fucking bestie or some shit and just started small talk with my team!" Noel snarled as he accepted the sake with a nod. "Thank fuck Ibiki has enough intuition to back the fuck away."

Shibi rose a brow in question of the younger man's words. They had been placed on the same team upon graduation from the academy. Shibi was unlucky to be placed with not only Tsume Inuzuka, who had no clue what the words 'personal space' or 'inside voice' meant; but he also had even worse luck to be stuck with Noel, a clanless orphan who just so happened to be a little too into his poison sebon. His old teammates got along like a house on fire. They would drag him off to what he could only assume was his death every time they showed up at his door. Now as semi-adults nothing had really changed except Tsume getting pregnant and popping out a baby with the opposite temperament of its mother. Tsume named her old teammates the godmother and godfather with a huge grin. Noel got pissed at the implications of her words and proceeded to flip his long thick hair over his shoulder. Claiming them as godparents also meant that Tsume could drop her 'pup' off at either one of their houses without question at anytime of the day with the same smug grin as she told the two men it was their duty as pack. At least Hana was a quiet girl. Her new baby Kiba on the other hand was too much for Shibi to handle. His own baby, Shino, didn't fuss a fraction of what that child kicked up.

Shibi was snapped out of his rambling by the serious stare on Noel's face. He nodded showing the other that he was listening and to continue. Noel gave a sigh of frustration.

"I've been talking to Xanxus lately and I think I am going back to T&I after this group of genin moves up." Noel explains sipping from his cup. "He agreed with me and I'm going to pull Ibiki with me. I've been working on finding a kenjutsu master for Hayate, and a fire type trainer for Tokara. I wanted to ask Mikoto but Fugaku was being a dick to me. So I'm not even going to try setting foot near the Uchiha compound because I am 100% sure I will play pin cushion with that stuck up bastards head."

Shibi sighed in exasperation at his words. Noel and Fugaku had a mutual and very public hatred for each other that was known throughout the village for years now. It was odd considering how well Noel got along with Mikoto. In fact, Mikoto was the ONLY adult Uchiha Noel could stand simply because of one person. Xanxus. The ebony haired ninja was quiet and constantly angry. He was considered a bastard of the Uchiha clan since his mother was a civilian woman from the hidden mist. Xanxus came to Konoha in his early teens after leaving the bloody mist. He had gone through their horrific graduation exam and upon passing was told of his parentage. He came in search of answers, but was turned away even after revealing his sharingan. He was angry with the clan, but had no desire to return to the mist. He pledged loyalty to the hidden leaf and after being watched for over a year he was finally accepted. At some point he met Noel and the two somehow became a thing. Tsume went on for months about Noel finally getting some. Shibi did not want to know as much as he did about his ex-teammates private intimate lives.

"Also, before I forget…" Noel started pulling a small scroll from his pocket. "Here is your invitation, we expect you to be on time with a gift that actually benefits us."

Shibi's brow rose before he took the scroll and unrolled it. He nearly spit out his sake at the first words on the parchment.

 **You are invited to the joining ceremony of**

 _ **Xanxus & Noel**_

 **Held at an undisclosed time and location to be announced**

 **If you wish to attend the festivities please personally inform the ceremony officiant**

 _ **Inuzuka Tsume**_

"Is this actually serious?" Shibi choked out in disbelief.

"Xanxus asked me after his last mission and I said yes. We are also thinking of adopting once we do." Noel grinned. "Xanxus wants a kid that acts like him, but I want one like Mikoto's adorable little Tachi."

Noel started to blissfully ramble on about the doe eye Uchiha that he and Kushina, another crazy woman befriended by his friend, cooed over. He was interrupted by the earth shattering roar and the thick saturation of malicious chakra in the air.

"I'm going to see what's going on, you go check on my little bug." Noel spoke seriously as he gestured toward Shino's nursery.

That night several things occurred before anyone could stop them from happening. Konoha lost its Hokage, many children were orphaned, the village was partially destroyed, and one blonde baby was branded a monster due to his father's blind trust. Xanxus and Noel did eventually get their joining ceremony, but they also decided to adopt after the kyuubi attack. They were now the parents of a perky 2 year old girl with big brown eyes and twin buns.


	12. Harry Potter AU Part 2

The Marauders were mentally cheering. That Hufflepuff cult leader was in his final year now. Their tormentor would finally be leaving them and possibly the United kingdom. It was all over the papers how the creepy Puff had been hand picked to become the assistant of Newt Scamander. He would allegedly be traveling all over the world to discover new creatures for Scamander's latest book. It was a dream come true.

The quartet sat at Gryffindor's table eyeing the 7th year. Noel smiled at his fellow housemates seemingly unaware of the stares. Snivilus sat at his side reading as his upperclassmen was eating a steak that was basically still mooing. Remus shifted in his seat uncomfortable with the sight. Sirius scowled at them before turning to James.

"We need to prank him again prongs." he said in a serious tone.

Peter turned to stare at the dog animagus in disbelief. He shook in fear at the idea of the backlash from their last prank. He didn't tell the other three what happened to him after dinner that evening.

*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*

 _Peter cried in fear as he backed into the trunk of a thick tree. They had separated him from the school and herded him into the forbidden forest. There were 3 of them in total. They looked like stags but with the hindquarters of birds. They were elegant and imposing. The ones on the left and right towered over Peter's mousey frame at an intimidating 7ft with glossy fur and feathers the color of moonlight, but the one in the center was truly terrifying in its appearance. It was at least 2 ft taller than ones flanking it. Its fur was pale, but as the feathers started at its back the color faded into a bright teal with flecks of shimmering silver throughout. Its antlers were thick and ash grey in color with 20 points. Its eyes were a bright teal with horizontal pupils. It huffed as it seemed to glare down into the weak willed Gryffindor. It bellowed in his face in warning stomping the ground in aggression before turning away slapping the teen in the face with its plumage in the process. Peter had officially wet himself in fear of what would happen next. Would this thing kick him, or let the other two claw up his face, he didn't know and it was killing him.. It gave a few flapps of its large wings before taking off into the air. The two left behind eyed Peter with their cold black gazes before moving on deeper into the forest._

 _Peter remained frozen in fear as as the sound of their hoofs quieted. He slowly stood before slowly making his way out of the now eerily silent forest. Something in his mind told him that he could and would have died tonight, but that thing was only warning him of what it could do. He knew that Hufflepuff had something to do with this and there would be no warning next time._

*~*~*FLASHBACK END*~*~*

Remus shivered and glanced away from his friends in trepidation. He didn't particularly want to go after the older teen, but he knew nothing he said would stop his two friends. Noel was every bit as threatening as his feral looking lover. He just knew how to hide his vindictive tendencies better.

*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*

 _Remus shifted nervously at his library table. He felt as if eyes had been on him all day and it unsettled his wolf greatly. He could feel moony pacing and it was a struggle not to snap at his classmates._

 _A stack of books was placed beside him snapping him out of his thoughts. He looked up and paled at the sight of a serenely smiling Noel Leclair._

" _Your little problem would be easier to bare if you accepted it." Noel chirped settling down next to him. "It could ease the pain of changing or better yet calm your wolf's agitation."_

 _Remus was shocked by his words as the other pushed the book stack in front of him. Remus noticed that they were about weres and high level mind charms._

" _Take a look when you have the chance, your compulsion charm needed work." Noel said leaving the young shocked werewolf to his studies._

*~*~*FLASHBACK END*~*~*

Remus did end up reading through the books which lead him to accept his wolf a bit more than he thought he would. He did still see it as a curse though.

Sirius and James had called off all pranks on Hufflepuff after that one because of Xanxus and his horrifying need to asset his dominant claim on Leclair. The man couldn't torture or kill them without getting himself a one-way ticket to Azkaban and a dementor's kiss, so he did the next best thing.

*~*~*FLASHBACK*~*~*

 _Sirius and James rushed down the hall despret to make it to transfiguration on time when they suddenly crashed into an invisible wall. The two groaned sprawled out at the top of one of the many castle staircases. A large dark shadow stood above them drawing the teens attention. Sirius choked on his spit at the sight of a smirking Xanxus no-name. James just stared up in silent apprehension._

" _I can't severely harm trash like you, but I can make your life fucking hell until Noel tells me to stop." He growled down at the two before wandlessly switching the two teens robes to slytherin green and walking off toward his Alchemy class._

*~*~*FLASHBACK END*~*~*

Remus did not envy the nearly 3 months worth of hexes, jinxes, and curses. He knew Peter would whimper at the sight of the french student and mumble something about a deer bird. Remus grew curious and looked it up in the library's bestiary. Perytons were rare but a small herd did live in the forbidden forest. Perhaps Peter had an unfortunate run in.

Noel glanced over at the Gryffindor's table and just so happened to catch the rats eye. He gave the coward a chilling smirk.


	13. Inuyasha AU

Inuyasha huffed as he walked behind the group. He was happy since his sword's heavy weight was no longer an issue. Totosai told him he needed to prove himself for the sword to lighten. It was complete bullshit. The only thing that would have made the situation worse would be if Totosai had told that winged menace that claimed to be his primary caregiver when he was young. It was bad enough the pest was a former general of Hyoga that was apparently a spy for Sesshomaru's mother all along, but the damned moth seemed to have made it his life's goal to harass him at every turn in his life. Nothing about the bug could be trusted.

The soft flutter of insect wings filled the air as Inuyasha and company made their camp. The Hanyo scented the air before growling. Think of a demon and they will appear.

"What's up with you Inuyasha?" Shippo asked.

"An annoying bug that never leaves me alone." He growled in reply.

A lyrical laugh sounded through the night putting the group on high alert. They pressed back to back with their weapons ready as they analyzed their heavily wooded surroundings. The voice had echoed all around them without a definite source in sight.

"Come now darling is that any way to treat your nanny dearest." The voice chirped.

The group turned with weapons ready only to see a cloud of sparkling green powder. Inuyasha scowled.

"Show yourself pest!"

The laughter echoed around them until a tall lithe figure emerged from the powder. Long teal hair cascaded down their back, a pair of eyes matching it glittered with mischief, various magenta colored markings littered their pale skin. A pair of ivory colored antenna protruded from their forehead and a large pair of silvery Luna moth wings extended from their back. A long, slitted, backless cream cheongsam hugged torso and gave his wings room to flutter. He wore white bandages on his legs and no shoes.

"My little puppy is all grown up." The unknown demon cooed at the Hanyo.

"And you're still as batshit crazy as you were 50 years ago Noel!" Inuyasha growled.

Noel smiled sweetly at his charge before rushing forward too fast for the others to react. The moth yokai had Inuyasha in his arms cradling the flailing boy to his chest. He tilted the hanyo's head up with a finger making a tsking at the younger boy's flailing. The difference in their height, strength, and the hanyo's uneasiness was proof that the being before them was a daiyokai.

"Now now puppy is that how I taught you to speak to your elders? Do I need to reinstate the parchment punishment?" Noel smiled.

Inuyasha whimpered in his hold and shook his head in fear of the elder Demon's threat. The group was in various states of shock and awe.

"Just be glad your father assigned me to you or you would have been stuck with my resting bitch face of a husband." Noel huffed petting inuyasha's ears. "Luckily he still had his hands full with Sesshomaru's huge ass ego."

The others were utterly speechless. This foreign demon had come from absolutely nowhere and turned the loud and broody Inuyasha into a whiny puppy with a few words and forced cuddles.

"Now then my dreary little pup what happened to your sword? I sensed the fang breaking and rushed here as soon as I could." Noel cooed.

Kagome choked on air at his words.

"That was weeks ago though!" She shrieked causing everyone to wince in pain.

Inuyasha, still held tightly in the older demon's grasp, glanced up at the older demon before speaking in clear exasperation.

"Why are you really here?"

"Because we heard that Hyoga's trashy brat was trying to take over." Another voice interrupted from the air.

Noel pouted as a darker male appeared in the sky, flapping his large inky black feather wings, with a scowl. His blood red eyes glared at everyone present. Inuyasha paled further and buried his face into the silk clothed chest of the moth. He flew down before the two and tugged Inuyasha from the tealette's arms.

"Stop babying the little shit he obviously handled everything here so we need to get back to our main priorities." He growled shoving Inuyasha toward his friends.

"But Xanxus." Noel whined. "I don't want to deal with the Lady's guests anymore they're so stuffy and prudish."

Xanxus sneered at the others pout before wrapping a thick arm around the others narrow waist. He nosed the side of Noel's neck scenting him before pulling back to glare at the hanyo.

"You rubbed your wet dog stench all over him." He growled. "Your just like your damn father, mutt had to scent mark everything he thought was his."

Noel giggled and slapped the other's arm playfully.

"Hush Xan you know it was nothing like that." He said placating the crow demon. "Our Lord only did that so Sesshomaru would pick it up on me as a babe. Our Lady was very aware of that."

Inuyasha was shocked at Noel's words feeling a bit of envy well up within him.

"What does Sesshomaru have to do with anything." He glared up at the man who practically raised him.

Xanxus smirked kissing the side of Noel's head and tugging Inuyasha on the ear. Inuyasha swatted him away before unintentionally giving big puppy eyes to Noel. The moth demon squealed pulling the teen back into his arms in a constricting hug.

"You are just too precious for words." Noel laughed petting the hanyo into submission. "Just because I am your main watcher does not mean I ONLY helped with you."

"You always were a jealous little shit." Xanxus snarked flapping his wings as he kicked off into the air.

"FUCK OFF OLD MAN!" Inuyasha yelled.

"Inuyasha what have I told you about your language." Noel said calmly.

Inuyasha whimpered as the moth demon pulled a thick parchment roll from seemingly nowhere.


	14. Yuri! on Ice AU Part 2

Noel sighed as he watched the object of his affection speak to his brother and sister. He really wanted to drop into that man's lap and curl up like a lazy cat. He bet the elder wouldn't object to the situation either. Ever since the grand prix final the two had kept in contact. He even spent a week in Italy with them man that was honestly less about sightseeing and more about eye fucking each other. Noel was extremely disappointed when nothing highly physical happened beyond a hug or cheek kiss. The tealette had needs that were not being satisfied. Xanxus would pay for the cockblocking.

Upon return to America, Noel immediately went into planning for the next competition. He was not shy about his pair skating and thankfully he had a partner with a similar petty aggressive tactics mentality. When he first pitched the theme for their upcoming season his skate partner was 100% in. Normally they would bicker like an old married couple off the ice, but when infatuation and desire for sexy Italian men came into play they were eerily in synch. They planned their music, choreography, and costumes meticulously and were dead set on bringing every skater to their knees. M.M., or Margot-Monique, had been his partner for a little over 3 years. She had the stamina and attitude to keep up with him on the ice and a personality that pandered to the most irritating of reporters. They dominated the skating world with pretty smiles and passive aggressive comments. This year would be no different than any of the others.

This time around their theme was seduction. Noel did not lie when he told Xanxus that his programs this year would be about him. M was kind enough to let him choose the music and choreograph the short and exhibition skates while she handled the free skate. Celestino begrudgingly accepted their choices since they were a force when they actually worked together on something.

Their short was a tango inspired piece set to The Crocodile Tango by Johnny Cunnigham. Noel went all out for their looks and ended up with costumes that looked as if they had come out of the bad romance video. M would wear a black crop top with a lace illusion neckline. An overlay of black lace would settle on top of a pair of black safety shorts in a pseudo high low skirt. Beneath it all would be a black net body suit with thumb hole sleeves. Noel went full on long sleeve black lace bodysuit with a halter neckline and sheer underlay. A sheer red train would settle at his waist line and end at the back of his knees giving the illusion of a skirt. A decorative floral clip of black and red roses and netting would hold back his mass of hair. His underwear would definitely be visible.

The free skate was set to the upbeat pop of Zhoumi's what's your number. M wanted it to be a modern seduction that was more about making the person being pursued smile. They decked themselves out in formfitting pastel. Noel's was in a light violet form fitting suit with a soft yellow undershirt. M's baby pink sweet heart dress flared out as if it had several layers of petticoats beneath it. He honestly suspected that she just wanted to sneak a kpop song in since lyrical music was allowed now in competition. However he couldn't deny how much fun they had with the program though.

Their exhibition was going to be his siren call to Xanxus. He made sure every bit was perfect and even managed to slip their risqué costumes past the ISU. Talk dirty to me was difficult but the pay off was worth the scandalized and lustful eyes it would no doubt draw. M paired the song with their matching high waisted shorts and black cropped tank tops with their names printed in glittery font on the fronts.

Europeans would be the first time Xanxus would be seeing the programs meant for him. It would also be the first time since Noel left Italy that the two would see one another. It was Noel's petty revenge for not getting laid when he visited. He couldn't wait to have the older man's eyes on him. He couldn't wait for the feeling of red eyes burning into his barely covered back.

M and Noel made their way to the side of the ring with confidant strides. Skaters stared at them as they walked by in disbelief for their revealing attire. A whistle alerted them to the appreciative gaze of Christophe Giacometti. The Swiss skater winked at Noel as they made eye contact. The tealette blew him a kiss in return.

"I thought you were trying to attract Crispino?" M questioned at his side.

"I am, but I does not hurt to have others appreciate all of the hard work I put into this." Noel replied with a scoff.

"You are devious." M laughed.

"He won't know what hit him." Noel smirked unzipping his jacket to reveal his short program costume.

M smirked as she handed her own over to Celestino.

"So true. I can't wait for Mukuro to see me out there." She said confidently.

Noel grimaced at her words.

"He is basically my little brother and it is very disturbing to hear you talk about him so obsessively."

"Get use to it." She huffed as their names were called out to get on the ice.

They smirked as the audience went silent upon their entrance. Noel could already hear the murmurs of shock and awe and he relished in it. The pair skated to the center of the ice but stayed about 5 feet apart as they took their starting poses. Noel was holding his train like a matador cape and M with her arms wrapped around her hips looking back over her shoulder at him. They were going to melt the ice with their program.


	15. New Era of Fairies

Noel stared blankly at the young teen settled nervously across from him. A ruby tinted frown and lightly kohl lined eyes drew attention to his pearlescent skin and unnerving teal eyes. He managed to braid his thick wavy locks until they fell at his hips in a neat plait. The mid length dress flattered his willowy frame and hid his true gender from unknowing minds. He was here for one reason; and that required him to play dress up.

"Do you know why I am here?" He asked the boy calmly.

The young boy watched him with narrowed chalky mint colored eyes.

"To kill me…...for the future." He answered cautiously.

"No." Noel said cutting the thought down. "I had nothing to do with your particular future little flower, but I wish I had after hearing some of Belphegor's stories."

Noel shifted brushing out his full skirt before releasing a deep sigh.

"You have the potential to be more than what you had been in that future. I can help you achieve it." Noel said softly.

"Why." The teen grimaced, looking around with shifty eyes to spot any sort of trap.

"I like you. What little of your future self I can remember was smart, tactile, and most importantly adaptive." Noel answered.

He stood from the chair and moved closer to the teen with a smile slowly curling on his face. He grasps the pale boys chin and tilts his head up to meet his gaze.

"I want you to be one of the few who take my place when the time comes. Noel purred. "I want you to become a Fée Verte."

"A what?" The teen asked confused.

Noel chuckled before looking over his shoulder at the door to the small visitors room. A nervous looking officer scurried in with a stack of papers. He gave the tealette a bashful smile.

"Everything seems to be in order, you're free to take him home now miss." He said.

Noel gave him a stunning smile.

"Thank you so much for your help doctor! I can't believe my parents would just lock him away like that. They always stressed the importance of family and yet they would cast off my precious baby brother." Noel said tearfully as he pitched his voice higher.

He wrapped the teen in a warm hug nuzzling into his choppy mint green locks.

"Thank you for allowing him home with me." Noel sniffed.

It was fascinating what words and a made up face could do. Noel barely had to work to get the teen out of the prison, but he wasn't going to complain. Less risk and fewer chances for the job to go to hell. This job benefited him in ways he honestly never thought of. It was another chance to have his name live on.

He was highly suspicious of the call from a man called Gamma. He remembered the name and the family attached to it. He informed Xanxus and had a meeting set up on mutual ground. He found himself flanked by the Varia officers sitting across from Yuni, leader of the Giglio Nero. Behind her was 3 of the funeral wreaths Byakuran, Bluebell, and Zakuro. Every time Byakuran would even glance at him Xanxus would raise his gun. Noel sighed before questioning the young girl. He was shocked by the young Donna's proposal. She was practically begging for him to use his abilities and connections to get one of their own from a prison with a reputation nearly on par with the now decimated Estreno. Against his Fiancee's wishes he agreed, but on the condition that he train them for his own reasons. She readily agreed.

He doesn't regret his decision. He sees potential in the intelligent teen. He would do well as a future assassin instead of the cocky shit his future self had become.

The teen sat quietly in his passenger seat as Noel drove. He had not spoken a word since they left the prison hours ago. The male was beautiful and had an air of complete control. There had been no hostility or disdain directed at him for the events that occured in the future. It put the teen on edge from the time they left up to their arrival at a large intimidating mansion that looked more like a castle than a large home. The tealette parked in the garage and as they stepped out the boy could only stare in wonder. There were cars parked in clusters throughout the underground garage. They ranged in everything from a gaudy hot pink Ferrari to a solid black matte kawasaki bike with a glittery silver crown decal.

He was steered toward into elevator that took them up to the main floor of the mansion. When the doors opened a grinning teen with long blonde bangs covering his eyes was waiting.

"About fucking time you got here, the prince has had to dodge over 30 glasses of tequila since you left." The teen complained draping himself over Noel's shoulders.

"Is everyone in Xan's office Belphegor?" Noel asked petting the teen nuzzling his neck.

"Yes, is the prince's governess going to calm the beast?" Bel asked hopefully.

"Of course, don't I always." Noel smirked before looking at the other teen. "Come, you must meet the rest of the Varia properly."

The green haired boy nodded eyeing the snickering teen cautiously as he followed the older male. They walked through several corridors before arriving at a large set of thick oak doors. The sound of muffled yelling was heard before Noel pushed the doors open with a flourish. The room went silent at the sight of the crossdresser and a visible sign of relief went through everyone in the room. A white haired male was holding a tall man with weird facial hair in front of him and a flamboyant man in sunglasses was ducking behind a overturned coffee table. A man with glaring red eyes stood form his decadent throne and eyed the tealette over for injuries before glaring at the teenager beside his lover.

"Xanxus, Squalo, Lussuria, and Levi this is Kikyo." Noel said looking at each varia officer as he said their name. "I will be training him from now on so get use to him being here."

Xanxus scowled.

"Why the fuck did you agree to that?" He growled stalking up to the two.

Noel didn't flinch or back down from the intimidating scowl. Noel smiled sweetly before grasping the Varia leaders collar and pulling him into a passionate kiss. Xanxus, by reflex, wrapped his arms around the smaller man's waist. Lussuria giggled from beside Kikyo causing the fascinated male to look up at him curiously. Lussuria noticed the gaze before smiling.

"Boss was very worried about Noel helping you out. He was almost certain that it would be a trap. We were doing our best to restain him so that he wouldn't hunt you down and shoot you in the face again." Lussuria sighed wistfully. "We should leave them alone, they might be awhile."

The flamboyant male lead Kikyo out of the office and down another hall into a lounge. Lussuria smiled at him with a masked look of wariness.

"You wait here while I find you some food and clothes. I'm sure Noel has set up a room for you somewhere, but we will just have to wait until he is done calming boss down." He said leaving the teen alone.

Kikyo sat still for a few minutes before looking up at a large photo of a younger Varia together surrounding Xanxus on a throne with Noel in his lap. He smiled softly at the low key family photo as he waited. He was always good at waiting. He waited for his parents to come back and bail him out, for the officers to stop abusing their authority, for the other members of his gang to approach him instead of ducking away in fear or envy, and for Byakuran to come save him. He never expected this outcome. In the future he had only interacted with Noel on one occasion.

****Flashback****

 _The older male was sitting in the millefiore infirmary staring into space as his box animals healed a few injured white spell members. He didn't acknowledge Kikyo until the younger cleared his throat. Noel slowly turned to gaze up at the other male._

" _Yes." He asked with a blank stare causing Kikyo to shift at the unnerving look before he spoke._

" _Are you ok?" He asked before shaking his head at the stupidity of the question. "I mean is your healing ability helping any?"_

 _A brief flash of resentment and anguish flared in his eyes before he answered._

" _Yes, to both." He replied softly. "This is just a punishment for my choices."_

 _Kikyo was shocked at his words before a chilling smile appeared on the elder's face._

" _I have accepted that I will die here not knowing if everyone I love is ok." Noel stated. "I am ok, there is no need to think of me with pity any longer."_

 _Kikyo opened his mouth to speak before he was cut off by the other's soft voice._

" _You remind me of myself before I met Xanxus. I did everything with clinical precision and never let my emotions rule my actions." Noel said staring into his wide eyed gaze. "One day you will find that special someone who will make you do the craziest things simply because you are in love. Never leave them, or you could end up just like me. Dying alone as a miserable shell of your former self."_

****Flashback end****

Kikyo was snapped out of his thoughts by the return of Lussuria with a bundle of fabric and two boxes in his arms.

"Noel sent me a text and asked me to get you these." Lussuria said with a knowing smirk. "He said it is the beginning task of your training."

Kikyo took the bundle into the nearby bathroom with a nervous ache in his chest. The interior was spacious and covered in ivory marble. Once inside he lifted the fabric up off of the boxes only to flush in embarrassment. He was given a long black dress made of silk and lace. He turned even redder when he noticed the underwear that came with it. The teen never questioned his masculinity even if he had been told he had a pretty face his whole life. The idea of putting on the dress was a bit nerve racking. He thought back on Noel's words and sigh in defeat. The elder male had said he would be passing his legacy to Kikyo. That legacy could only be his assassination reputation. Kikyo shakily undressed before before pulling on the satin monstrosities they called bikini cut underwear and a padded bra. He slid the dress up over his narrow hips and pushing his arms through the dress sleeves. Luckily the zipper was easy to pull up. The dress was admittedly gorgeous. It had a daring split up to his upper thigh, a high lace collar with a square neckline, and a cinched waist that gave him a more feminine figure drawing attention away from his broad shoulders. Kikyo smoothed out the skirt and proceeded to open the first box. Inside was a pair of plain black 2 inch thick heeled mary janes, a small black case, and a makeup bag. He pulled the shoes on before opening the case. Inside was a set of sebon and a thigh holster. He quickly strapped them in place before opening the makeup bag. Kikyo snorted seeing the tinted lip balm, eyeliner, mascara, and finally the teal shadow his adult self was fond of. Applying the makeup carefully he finally opened the final box. It was a wig. A perfect replica of his thick wavy locks from adulthood. He pinned it in place and couldn't help staring at himself in awe. You couldn't tell that he was male anymore. A slow smiled pulled on his face as he continued to admire his features. A knock at the door startled him out of his thoughts.

"Kikyo are you finished?" The soothing purr of Noel's voice called through the door.

"Yeah, I'm coming out now." He replied.

The teen took a deep breath before walking confidently out into the lounge. Noel, who had changed into a comfortable pair of fleece pjs covered in bullets, was not alone in the room upon his entrance. Xanxus lounged in the large leather armchair glaring at him. Lussuria stared at him with an unyielding look of glee as he set a tray with food onto the coffee table. Noel pulled him into the center of the room and looked him up and down while circling him like a shark. He nodded before a bright smile overcame his face.

"Beautiful, I knew I chose correctly." He laughed. "I can train you until Fran is ready."

"Fran?" Kikyo asked unsure.

"Yes." Noel smiled. "I am making both of you my successors."

Noel cupped Kikyo's cheeks and kissed his forehead.

"Be prepared for hell like no other, because being a Green Fairy is more the bending your gender." He smirked. "It requires you to learn everything about the body, mind, and the substances that alter them."

Kikyo stared in shock.

"Luckily you already know how to kill and plan for the best outcomes." Noel sighed settling into Xanxus' side. "We just have to work on everything else."

Kikyo looked down at himself before trying to deny his need for training when the door to the room opened revealing Belphegor along with 3 familiar faces. Yuni grinned thanking the amused prince before stopping to stare fascinated at Kikyo. Behind her Gamma and Zakuro's jaws had dropped. Yuni squealed rushing over to hug Kikyo tightly.

"You're so pretty, like a fairytale princess!" She giggled.

Kikyo smiles at he before glancing up at the other teens in the door. Zakuro blushed when he made eye contact with the mint haired male. Xanxus glared keeping a hand on his gun. Noel smirked at the sight before planting a kiss to his fiance's cheek. He stood and approached the group with a knowing smile.

"As you can see your cloud is free, but I expect him for training once a week." Noel said.

"Why only once?" Kikyo asked curiously.

Noel turned with a dangerous grin.

"Because I expect you to enroll in classes for anatomy and psychology as soon as possible. When you come once a week I will teach you about poisons and seduction. You will also be expected to cross dress 4 days a week as well." Noel rattled off with a growing smirk.

Kikyo was dazed by the information intake, but sighed and nodded.

"I owe you this much and more for getting me out of that hell hole." Kikyo stated.

Noel smiled patting his shoulder.

"Now get the hell out. I will call when I have everything set for you."

"What about the Fran kid?" Kikyo asked.

"Fran is already knowledgeable about everything i will teach you. He is still young and nowhere near the level of power of his future self. He needs to go with his master before I start to teach him again." Noel explained leading the group to the mansion doors.

He turns and grins gesturing them to their waiting car.

"Their is no need to thank me for any of this young Donna." Noel smiled at Yuni as she passed. "You have given me a wonderful opportunity and I am grateful."

Yuni returned his smile with an enthusiastic nod. She hurried off to follow the others to the car.

As the Giglio Nero drove off Belphegor slid up behind Noel's quiet form. Wrapping his arms tightly around the other's waist. He tilted his head in curiosity.

"Why did you want him? I get froggy, but why him?" The teen asked.

Noel smiled turning to face his pseudo son.

"He's pretty, has green hair, super smart, and he's deadly; those are the qualities I am know for and those are the qualities i wanted in a successor. Fran is young, but I felt he deserved his own title after receiving my training."

"What's that?" Bel chuckled.

"Petite Sirène, keep the dark fairytale jokes going." Noel grinned. "His illusions would solidify the concept hopefully."

Belphegor smirked pulling Noel back into the mansion complaining about not getting enough attention. Noel just laughed kissing the teen's head.


	16. Supernatural AU

Dean groaned leaning back in the booth across from his brother. They had no leads on their current hunt and it was getting frustrating. They had dealt with fairies in the past so why was this so hard. Sam glanced up at his brother with a raised eyebrow.

"You ok man?" Sam asked.

"I think we need to call in some reinforcements." Dean answered reluctantly.

"What, like Bobby?" Sam pressed.

"No." Dean said shaking his head. "I think I need to call in the big guns."

"Who?" Sam asked now fully focused on his brother.

"Us obviously." A smooth voice cooed in their heavy French accent.

The brothers were startled at the appearance of a willowy male with green hair in a messy top knot. A larger man with tan skin and choppy ebony hair stood beside him. Both wore amused smirks on their faces.

"Noel, what a surprise." Dean sighed eying the two older hunters.

"I heard there was a bit of a fey infestation in the area so Xanxus and I were planning to take care of it." Noel hummed sliding into the booth beside Dean. "But seeing you here makes me think that you are on this case."

"Pretty much." Dean huffed in frustration.

Noel gave the young Hunter a shark like grin. He leaned on close catching Dean's eyes in an intense stare.

"All you have to do is say the words." Noel purred. "Say the words and all your problems will be over."

Sam cleared his throat eyeing Noel and the dozing Xanxus sitting beside him.

"Are you two hunters?" He asked confused.

Noel turned slowly giving the young man a sweet smile.

"You must be Sam." He said cheerfully.

He reached a hand across the table for Sam to shake grinning before turning back to Dean.

"I'm waiting Sister Christian." Noel cooed.

Dean groaned dropping his head to the table.

"I wish the goblins would come and take me away." Dean started with a dejected sigh. "Right now."

Noel squealed happily before pulling the man into a tight hug.

"Oh Dean-Bean I missed you." Noel laughed.

Dean looked about ready to run before a gruff voice sounded from Xanxus.

"What was your last lead?" He asked sitting up in the booth.

Sam jumped in shock not expecting the man to speak before giving dean a confused pout. Dean glanced up at his brother before groaning and sliding their notes over toward than tan male. He turned back to the other man with a confused frown.

"So how did you guys meet Dean?" Sam ask curiously.

The Green haired man gave Sam an amused smile.

"Oh we know both of you Sammy." He laughed.

"What?" Sam asked confused.

"John used the same hunter as us so we met the two of you when you were just tiny podlings." Noel beamed.

"What is it with you and the 80s?!" Dean groaned in frustration.

"Bonjour pot je suis kettle." Noel hummed as a waitress came up to their table and asked if they would like anything.

"Can I please get a strawberry milkshake and the largest amount of fries you can give me?" He asked her sweetly. "Oh, and a beer."

She nodded writing it down. She glanced at Xanxus with a light blush, but he didn't do much as give her a glance before speaking.

"I only eat the best and I doubt that's here so just bring me a beer and fuck off."

The waitress nodded jerkily before rushing off.

"So rude of you love." Noel smiled before turning to the younger males. "What did you find?"

Sam and Dean were shocked, but for different reasons. Dean was surprised by Xanxus and his brutal put down. Sam was still focused on how the youthful men beside them were around when they were kids.

"How old ARE you two?" Sam asked.

Noel turned to him with a grin.

"Old enough." He chirped. "What did you find Xan?"

"Same shit we have, but they are missing the fairy circles." Xanxus mumbled shoving the notes back to Sam. "Did you trashy little shits not check the woods or parks nearby?"

"We checked the woods, but why parks?" Dean asked.

Noel sighed as the waitress returned with their beers.

"Not all fairies stick to entering this dimension through a fairy circle. Some, like redcaps, already dwell on this plane and are known to gather in places with easy access to humans. I'm guessing that they are exactly what we are dealing with."

"Redcaps." Dean snorted.

"Yes, but I suppose you would know them as a type of goblin. They are like pint sized trolls who paint their heads in blood." Noel nodded.

Sam gazed at the elder hunter in a starstruck manner.

"What other fairies are common in America?" He asked fascinated. "Are there any friendly ones?"

Noel laughed at his eagerness.

"Well there is of course the seelie and unseelie courts that usually venture out in the human world, but cause little to no harm. A good number of water fae exist as well with the same attitude. Now pixies and Fir Darrig are tricky. One is mischievous and the other is always out for blood. Don't even get me started on the banshees and leprechauns."

Dean snorted at the besotted look on his younger brother's face. Xanxus scowled as he pinched the other man's hand to gain his attention. Sam flinched quickly pulling away his hand and looking at Xanxus with a scandalized expression.

"Look kid, get whatever the fuck your thinking out of your head. Noel ain't answering every fucking question your brain shits out."

Noel grinned at his partner with mischievous eyes.

"Darling he can ask me anything his little heart desires." He cooed. "We can call this hunt a refresher course for the boys. It will be no different from when we taught the hellions."

Xanxus gave his lover a chilling grin.

"Can I use any means?"

"Always love." Noel replied with a smirk.


	17. Yuri! on Ice AU part 3

Xanxus was 100% sure that he tried to murder a bunch of children in a past life. That was the only thing he could think he had done to deserve the torture Noel was putting him through out on the ice. Not only was the Frenchman skating around in a bodysuit that left little to the imagination, but his lacy boy shorts were on display for the whole Damn world to see. Xanxus wanted to shoot someone, preferably the girl wrapped around Noel's arm. He scowled throughout their short program much to the amusement of his little sister.

"What are you so upset about?" Sara asked. "You had months to get him in bed and yet you refused him throughout his entire visit."

Xanxus sneered at her before turning back to the seductive tango on ice. He really did have no right to be mad, but that won't stop him from glaring.

"I even remember that week we stayed at Nonno's villa and he sunbathed naked for an entire day claiming he wanted a full coverage tan." Sara smirked. "When I asked him why he really did it he smirked and said he was trying to tempt you into mounting him in the courtyard."

Michele choked mid-sip of his water coughing uncontrollably and bright red in the face. Sara pat him on the back to help as Xanxus scowled at her knowing grin.

"It is your own fault big brother. Now accept the consequences."

The pair struck their final pose before grinning at one another. They bowed to the screaming audience and gathered their favorite thrown plush. M.M. hastily grabbed a pineapple and Noel picked up 2 tinkerbells. They skated to the kiss and cry where their coach grinned and a young boy that looked eerily similar to Noel plopped into the elders lace covered lap. M.M. scowled at the kid but ignored him to watch their score.

"Noel has a kid?" Michele asked curiously.

Xanxus scowled at the sight. Who did he sleep with and where could Xanxus find them? He only wanted to talk of course. Sara laughed shaking her head.

"No Mickey, that's Noel's little brother Fran." She beamed. "Noel always flies him and his babysitter out for competitions."

The eldest Crispino snorted as screams filled the arena. The French duo broke the pair short record.

Noel avoided him in the hotel. He avoided him in the rink. The teal haired minx was making Xanxus suffer. When he sat with his siblings for the pair free skate he was anxious and annoyed. He was not a happy camper. Sara grew excited when Noel and his ginger haired partner skated into the rink.

"Mickey aren't they cute? I love M.M's dress!" She fawned. "Aww and little Fran is dress up just like his brother."

Xanxus watched as Noel gave the little boy in the tiny pastel suit an air kiss before waving to the creepy looking teen holding the teal haired child.

"Is that the babysitter?" Xanxus asked his sibling.

"Yeah, his names Mukuro." Sara informed. "I follow his instagram. He has a twin sister named Chrome and they both claim to be Noel's siblings."

"I thought you said he only had 1 little brother?"

"He does, Mukuro's guardian Lancia is Noel's ex. Mukuro and Chrome grew up with Noel around since he and Lancia dated for about 4 years. So they refer to him as their elder brother."

Xanxus grit his teeth at the news. The object of his fantasies had held a long term relationship with someone and it did not sit well with him.

"Why did they split?" He huffed.

Surprisingly Michele was the one to answer him.

"Lancia wanted him to quit skating because it wasn't a serious job."

The other Crispino siblings were shocked.

"How could he?" Sara scowled.

Xanxus had to agree with his little sister's outrage. As he watched the couple move across the ice with smiles on their faces. He would never ask that of the Tealette. Noel was made to move on ice.

As the program ended the pair took their bows and moved to the kiss and cry. Noel gathered up his brother and pecked his forehead. He then pinched Mukuro's cheek causing the teen to scowl at him and swat away his hand. M.M. clung to his arm desperate for the teen's attention. It was no surprise that their scores got them gold.

Xanxus stood rink side as the exhibition skates went on. He glanced at the teen beside him with a curious stare. Fran twisted around the teen's legs and stared up at Xanxus with a bored look.

"It's creepy to stare at children for long periods of time ."

Xanxus stared wide eyed at the child in disbelief. Where did this kid learn to talk like this?

"Now Fran, that is no way to talk to your elders." Noel's silky voice cooed.

Xanxus turned to the the man and froze. Yeah, he definitely tried to straight up murder some kids. Noel stood before him in shorts that barely covered his butt and a crop top that left a teasing sliver of skin in view. Noel gave Xanxus a teasing smile.

"Hi."

Xanxus wanted to punch someone at that point. After avoiding him for the entire competition Noel decided his first word would be hi. It was beyond frustrating.

"Are you fucking with me?"

"No, but I wouldn't mind to."

"Is this about what happened at the villa?"

"More like what didn't."

Xanxus huffed before reaching out to clutch the thick braid Noel had pulled his hair into. He pulled Noel into a deep kiss. Noel smirked reaching up to wrap his arms around the taller male's neck to deepen it.

"Eww, you're gonna catch brother's fairy germs." Fran announced in childish disgust.

Noel stopped the kiss to grin at his baby brother. He leaned down to place a loud and exaggerated kiss on to the boy's plump cheek in retaliation for his words.


	18. Jurassic World AU

A/N: Hey everyone AskNoel is on tumblr if you have any questions for any Noel. There are already a few questions up so feel free to add more! You could also request AU ideas that may either become chapters or quick summaries! Enjoy the chapter!

"You and the mister up for beers tonight Frenchy?" Owen smirks settling beside the ash blonde keeper. "I haven't really gotten the chance to talk with any other handlers besides the touchy girls in the petting zoo."

Noel looked up from his sushi with a mischievous smirk.

"I suppose we could join…..If Barry is there." He answers. "Xanxus won't admit it, but he considers your partner in crime a friend. I also like having someone to talk shit about people with to their face."

Owen snorted in amusement. In his entire 'short' time on isla nublar the antics of the young Suchomimus and Baryonyx keeper and his dangerous looking husband have been a constant source of entertainment. Noel and Xanxus loved their vicious fish eating babies just as much as Owen hopes to love his girls. Most of the keepers, besides Owen and the crazy people who worked with the rex, mosasaur, and in the vet squad, usually gave the two a wide berth.

"You know they hatched us a new baby." Noel smiled. "She's beautiful, has these bright aqua patches over her eyes and jaw. I called her Beryl."

"It's a good feeling?" Owen asks in curious anticipation of his raptors hatching.

"The best." Noel beams.

Noel gave the future raptor keeper a contemplating look before grinning.

"Want to come check on my girls with me? Xanxus has his hands full with Beryl's check ups today and I could use an extra pair of eyes."

Owen was startled by the offer but nodded slowly.

"Sure, but how many are we checking on?" Owen asks. "Also don't you have other handlers working with you?"

"2 suchomimus and 3 Baryonyx at the moment and Claire anticipates us having a maximum of about 4 of each at any given moment in the future." Noel answered. "We do have around 7 helpers, but most of them are incompetent. There are only 2 that are of any use. They have experience with crocodiles and other aggressive lizards."

Noel grinned looking Owen over with a look of contemplation.

"How would you like to have your own little welcome party at our place tonight instead?"

"Uh, sure. I mean that would be awesome! Wait who would be there?"

Noel smiled sweetly eating the last of his nigiri.

"Oh probably just Barry, Lauren and Squalo from the Mosasaur lagoon, Levi from compost, my friend Lussuria from the vet techs, my brother, and Xanxus and I of course."

Owen cringed a little at the list. He had met the Mosasaur handlers before. Lauren was very energetic and was usually the one giving the dino talks for shows. Squalo on the other hand was a very loud and brash guy the was mostly in charge of feeding and the wellbeing of the giant dinosaur they named Alo. Levi was a douchebag, enough said. Lussuria had hit on him a total of 7 times in the 2 minutes they had interacted when he was being given a tour of the park. Owen didn't even want to think about what a kid raised by Noel AND Xanxus would be like. The couple themselves were great if not like the epitome of an old married couple that would talk shit to each other on a daily basis. If he didn't see them attached at the mouth every other hour of the day or that gaudy ring on Noel's fing he just would have thought they were good bros.

"...Okay." Owen agreed with poorly hidden reluctance.

"Great! Xanxus will pick you up from your bungalow around 7." Noel chirped standing from his chair.

Owen nodded in agreement as he watched the blonde walk away waving at him. Nothing but chaos could come from this. A chill crept down his spine at the thought.

XOXOXOXOXOXOX

Xanxus pulled up to Owen's bungalow a few minutes after 7 with a scowl on his face and a cat carrier in the passenger seat of his jeep.

"If you ride shotgun the little hellion is going in your lap." The gruff man said.

"Okay." Owen said.

He was about to pick up the carrier, but a tiny screech from within and the turbulent shaking of the carrier stopped him in his tracks. Xanxus snorted when Owen jumped back from the seat.

"I'll just sit in the back."

XOXOXOXOX

"Hoskins really hired you to 'control' the raptors huh?" Squalo snorted as he twisted his pale hair up into a messy bun. "I hope you're ready to have the fuck bugged out of you.

Lauren nodded in agreement with her fellow handler.

"Anything with pointy teeth has his attention. No doubt to exploit them."

A small boy with looks eerily similar to Noel was cuddled into his side stroking the tail of a baby Baryonyx. Said dinosaur was curled up in Noel's lap chirping curiously at the cat toy the frenchman twirled above it. It seemed on the verge of sleep and didn't make a move to snap at it.

"I know, everytime the man opens his mouth shit comes tumbling out." Owen groans draining the last of his beer.

"Just take it slow with them." Noel smiled sadly. "And don't get too attached until they make it to a month old."

"I think I can safely say the number that survives infancy has grown over the years." Lussuria adds.

Owen grinned at the idea of his raptors. They would be his pack,his family.

"The people in charge here only see numbers and what benefits them. The fact that these are living creatures seems to fly over their heads." Barry said thoughtfully.

"They won't see that fact until it bites them in the ass." Xanxus grunts standing from his chair.

He leans down pressing a kiss to Noel's temple before picking up the tuckered out dino and leaving the room.

"Be careful when you two get your charges." Noel frowned lifting a now sleeping child onto his hip. "They'll be watching you just as much if not more than us."


	19. Mass Effect AU part 1

Shepard:

I heard through the grapevine about your actions on Eden Prime. Good Job kicked robo ass out there. You do not know me, but I would like to extend a bit of charity for your hunt of the rouge spectre. I am having a set of 3 custom pistols delivered to the spectre office for you. I have done it before for Nihlus on many occasions and it is the least I could do for you for trying to save my friend. I will be in contact again soon Shepard. May the stars light your turbulent path.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

Feros must have been tough on you. Seeing all those humans controlled by a murder plant controlling a green Asari. I pray her biotics are not poisonous now. I hope the guns came in handy against the geth. They are truly amazing and I wish fear had not pushed them away all those years ago. Anyway, if you land on the Citadel anytime soon I got something special waiting for you with one of my good friends. All you need to do is enter the Consort's Chambers. My contact knows you are coming. Stay clear of mind.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

An Asari scholar barely out of adolescence? My my commander you sure know how to pick them. She is a very smart one I'll give you that. Ms.T'Soni has a bright future before her and I believe that you are going to be the catalyst. I hope Sha'Ira's words were helpful to you and your journey. I asked her to give you advice along with those prototype biotic amps. They are suppose to be more comfortable and easier to manage. I would not know if they worked well since I am not a biotic. Stay sharp.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

You must have froze your ass of out there commander. Noveria is no joke when it comes to ice and overall unpleasantness. I have done a lot of work from there and I hated every minute of my time on that block of Ice. I'm glad my contact caught you before you left for the labs. Those suits should have helped stave off the cold more than your current gear. Do not worry about that Rachni queen I had some people smuggle her to a planet outside of the council's jurisdiction. Look out for more goodies Shepard.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

We all have to make hard decisions in our life. The best thing you can do for yourself is move on. I can not say I am upset that your volatile and occasionally racist friend is gone, but I am happy that krogan of yours still breathes. I took the liberty of sending you the location of a weapon's cache on the citadel. Maybe a new shotgun and sniper rifle will cheer up your teammates a bit. I made sure the rifle would be able to sync up with Vakarian's visor. I will be in touch soon.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

Glad you made it off Citadel commander. The council is losing their shit over that stunt you pulled. One of my contacts gave your executive officer a box containing speciality ammo. It is mainly cryo and incendiary, but I also gave you a good amount of my personal stash of Thresher maw acid rounds. THEY ARE HIGHLY TOXIC! I do not recommend practicing with them. The best use would be large organics and synthetics that take some time to take down. One bullet puts them on their ass. Give them hell Shepard, we are counting on you.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

Holy shit you actually saved the Citadel. Those assholes on the counce do not know just how easily they could have fucked us all over. I do believe you deserve a few drinks commander. Head to Chora's Den and tell them Noel sent you. The bartenders will put whatever you and your crew want on my tab. Yes Noel is my name and that is all you should probably ever know about me other than my kind gift giving ways. Maybe we will meet one day, but for now let us keep some mystery to our liaison.

A Benefactor

Shepard:

Did you seriously try to look me up in the C-sect database? Oh honey, no. They never have and never will gain anything on me. I am to fucking thorough for that. Are you that desperate to meet me in person? I suppose I could meet you if you really want to. You are a spectre and all. How about we meet at Flux tonight? I have been meaning to try that place out. I will approach you so do not worry about finding me. Bring your Krogan and Asari. I have a few gifts to give.

A Benefactor

John Shepard was nervous as he sat beside Liara and Wrex in the pulsating club. The mysterious benefactor had given his team an edge in their fights that definitely made the entire mission a lot smoother. His curiosity was killing him and now he finally gets to put a name to a face. The lively synth beat washed over them as they waited and their anticipation was growing.

"Normally I charge for these little meet and greets, but for the savior of the citadel I will make an exception." A voice purred with a synthetic overlay.

Shepard snapped his head around and stared in fascination at the person before him. A curved yet willowy male Quarian stood before them with his arms crossed and hip jutted out in a casual contrapposto stance. He moved forward and leaned on the table in front of Shepard.

"Noel, pleased to finally meet you face to face my dear commander."

"You're a Quarian?" Wrex gruffed. "I was expecting a Turian, Hell even another krogan, but never did I think of a damn Quarian."

Noel laughed cheerfully at his words.

"That's why I like to keep the mysterious vibe going. It is much better for business.


	20. Mass Effect AU part 2

"What can you tell me about Noel and the arms dealer Xanxus?" Shepard asks leaning back on the couch casually."

"Well they're in love with each other, but dance around it with sexual tension." Aria scoffs. "Noel is over there dancing with some handsy Batarian that signed himself a death warrant from a possessive Turian. Xanxus is probably conducting business in some back alley with Noel's surrogate kid and that damn varren of his. I recommend that you grab Xanxus first in order to coax Noel to go with you."

Shepard shifted nervously before nodding in thanks. He glanced out over the club and spotted a Quarian draped in dark green dancing out of grasp of a larger Batarian.

"Xanxus is a highly sought after weapons manufacturer. They say every pistol he touches will have the firepower of a canon." Kasumi informs as the walked through Afterlife's back door.

Fortunately they found Xanxus. Unfortunately they found him in the middle of shooting a vorcha through the head.

"See that kid." Xanxus spoke gesturing with his gun to the large smoking hole where the Vorcha's face used to be. "You need to make a statement like that to get your point across to trash."

"What if they transfer the credits as your holding the gun up to their head?" The young quarian beside him asked curiously from his position petting the head of a large black and white varren.

"Accept it and then shoot the knee." Xanxus replied looking over into Shepard's wide eyes.

The ochre colored Turian's mandibles flared studying the group of humans before him. The two women were vastly different in size and personality. The hooded one smiled at him gleefully while the taller one scowled at him. Xanxus snorted at her face before facing Shepard.

"The Illusive man paid a shitload of credits out for my assistance." He started as he snapped his fingers causing the varren to prowl to his side. "He also guaranteed Noel would be on this little mission crew of yours as well."

"He is." Shepard replied shifting. "We were just heading up to the main club to get him."

"Good." Xanxus replied. "Then you won't mind if Kenn takes Bester and boards your ship."

The arms dealer walked off leaving a fuming Miranda, exasperated Shepard, and amused Kasumi in his wake. The group got the quarian and varren settled in the large storage room off the shuttle bay. Shepard returned to afterlife with Mordin instead of Miranda. The sight upon entering the club was both sensual and terrifying.

Noel had wrapped his arms around Xanxus' shoulders as the Turian nuzzled the part of his enviro-suit where the shorter's neck would be. Xanxus had his hands on the smaller male's hips slowly easing them down and was using his foot to force a knife deeper into the hand of the now bruised and bloodied Batarian that was previously dancing with the Quarian.

"Would recommend safe methods of intercourse, but guessing the two already heavily researched subject." Mordin said analyzing the couple. "Can provide proper supplements for Quarian should he decide to remove enviro-suit while on board.

"I have no doubt you are 100% correct doctor." Kasumi giggled.

"Let's just grab them and go already." Shepard gumbled.

Shepard could feel a migraine coming on just thinking about the criminals on his ship. He approached the couple warrily and cleared his throat.

"You two ready?" He asked.

"Of course my dear commander." Noel cooed.

He unwrapped himself from the Turian and walked up to Shepard giving him a tight squeeze.

"Long time no see. I heard you died from a couple of my contacts."

"Cerberus rebuilt me." Shepard informed.

"Cerberus? The ignorant bosh'tets that are anti-alien?" Noel laughed. "They were stupid enough to experiment on ancient beings they had no understanding of and attempted to create super soldiers."

Noel gave Shepard a once over.

"I guess they got one thing right. You look good for a patchwork human."

The group of 5 returned to the Normandy and left its new members to themselves. Xanxus gave Noel a glance over.

"Why did you let that scum touch you?" He growled.

Noel tilted his head before reaching up and caressing the dark clan marks on the Turian's face. His fingers traced from Xanxus' mandibles up to the points on his fringe.

"Darling I would never dream of allowing another to touch me the way you do. Remember Xan, I told you all those years ago when I first arrived on the Citadel, I belong to you."

"Just as I to you."

Noel hugged the Turian and snuggled into his chest. A soft rumbling started in Xanxus' chest as he clutched the small Quarian tighter to himself.

"I can't wait to look at you face to face again." Xanxus rumbled out.

"You just want to pull on my hair and bite me." Noel giggled as he twisted out of his arms and made his way over to Kenn. He pat the teen on the shoulder before crouching down to pamper Bester with praise, scratches, and kissy noises.

"So, you're Archangel." Noel chirped looking over Garrus in obvious mirth. "I have to say I expected someone taller."

Garrus chuckled and turned from calibrating the main gun.

"Well I'm sure you've had your fair share of 'you're not what I expected' over the years as well."

"Comes with the territory."

Noel leaned casually against the wall beside the door with a smug air to his stance. He saw that the Turian still used and modified the sniper rifle he supplied to him before Shepard took down Saren.

"I think I tried to kill your boyfriend at some point."

"I tried to kill you as payback, but I pitied you for the loss of your team."

Garrus froze up with a solemn look.

"Hey, just say the word and I'll track down that traitor of yours." Noel hummed backing out of the main battery. "After all, were teammates now Vakarian."


	21. Inuyasha AU Part 2

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Rin cried happily as her tiny legs carried her past trees and into the Forest clearing. "A very pretty man just gave me this basket of fruits! They are so yummy my Lord, would you like one?"

"Lord Sesshomaru doesn't want your silly fruit girl!" The imp hissed at her.

Sesshoumaru however, had stopped paying attention at Rin's claim of a 'pretty man' giving her the fruit.

"What did this man look like?" He asked the girl with slight trepidation.

"He was pale and had long pretty green hair. Oh! He had big pretty moth wigs too!"

Sesshoumaru stood from his position against a tree and started to make his way to AhUn. His pace was a lot quicker than normal and put Jaken on edge.

"Is something the matter Mi'lord?" The imp asked with a bit of fear tinting his voice.

Rin watched in confusion.

"We're leaving." Sesshomaru said trying to mask his urgency behind a cool facade.

He was stopped in his tracks when a needle thin insect scale flew through the air embedding itself in the ground before his feet.

"So fast? Surely you have time to catch up fluffy pup." A voice chimed from the branches of the surrounding trees.

2 figures dropped into the clearing with smirks on their faces as they stood between Sesshomaru and his companions.

"Heard you let that little shit cut off your arm so we came to check on you." Xanxus spoke with a bored tone.

"T-T-THAT HAPPENED MONTHS AGO!" Jaken shrieked.

Xanxus growled before kicking the annoying toad into the forest. Noel beamed at Sesshoumaru before pulling him down to plant a kiss on his brow.

"How are you pup?"

Sesshoumaru furrowed his brow as he stepped away from the beaming moth.

"Noel." He greeted calmly before glaring at Xanxus. "Dick."

Noel giggled at the sneer that stretched across his husbands face. He loved when his caretaking skills shined through in his charges.

"Xanxus, be a dear and go make sure Jaken wasn't impaled on something." Noel requested with a serene smile.

"Fine."

The crow demon stalked away with his glare burning anything in his path. Noel turned back to Sesshomaru with a frown. He grasped the younger demon's collar and tugged until the top came down enough to reveal his damaged arm.

"If you had returned home I could have salvaged it." Noel sighed. "I can't do anything for it now that your power has healed it all."

"I don't need your help. This Sesshomaru has done fine without you."

"I think not." Noel frowned lifting the dog demons arm for emphasis. "This little spat you have with Inuyasha needs to stop fluffy pup."

Sesshoumaru frowned at the name but did not correct the moth. Rin giggled at the cute nickname drawing the demons attention to her.

"Tell me little one, Do you like travelling with Sesshomaru?"

"Oh yes!" Rin grinned happily. "Lord Sesshomaru is very kind. He saved me many times!"

Noel turned to his charge with a smug grin.

"Did he now? Care to tell me about one such occasion."

"Of course! When I first met Lord Sesshomaru I didn't have anyone. I lived alone and didn't speak. I was in the woods one day and found my Lord covered in blood. I decided to bring him food, but I was eventually caught and beaten for taking it without permission."

Noel frowned at the young girls past, but let her finish her story.

"Wolves attacked the village not long after and I was chased down by some of them, but my Lord saved me and I have followed him ever since. Lord Sesshomaru always keeps the wolves away and even lets me sleep on his fluffy thing when I have bad dreams about them."

"Isn't that kind of him." Noel chuckles.

He gives her a kind smile before pulling the girl into a warm hug which she returns with a confused, but welcoming smile. Noel looks up at Sesshomaru with a grin. His fluffy puppy was really turning into his namesake.

"So you let her sleep on your tail without her realizing what it was? I guess you did take after your father in more ways than looks."

Sesshomaru huffs and walks away from the amused demon intent on ignoring him.

"Your father did the same with Izayoi. He also did it for you when I couldn't get you to sleep as a child."

Sesshomaru tunes him out as Noel told Rin stories of Sesshomaru's childhood causing the girl great joy. Xanxus soon returned with a pale Jaken clutched in hand. He tossed the imp on the ground as his eyebrow rose at Noel coddling the human child.

"We are not getting one." He stated.

"But Darling look how cute she is." Noel pouted.

"I don't give a fuck. Toga let you baby his damn kids is that not enough for you?" Xanxus groaned.

"No. They are to big for it now, besides look at this sweet little face." Noel cooed as he picked Rin up and held her for his husband to see.

Rin blushed, but smiled nonetheless causing Xanxus to flinch back.

"Just put her down so we can go." He grumbled. "You wanted to check on the brats and you did. We still need to get the mansion ready for the Lady's guests."

Noel sighed and set Rin on the ground. He planted a kiss to her head before turning to Sesshomaru.

"I expect you stay out of trouble from now on pup." He said moving forward to hug the younger demon. "Afterall, you have someone to protect now."

Sesshomaru froze at those words. His eyes wide in shock as he watched a sorrowful smile appear on the elder's face. Noel stepped back and slowly beat his wings until he lifted into the air.

"Bye darlings, see you soon.".

Rin waved cheerfully at the moth demon with a big smile on her face.

"Bye pretty sir, thank you for the fruits!"


	22. Dragon Age Inquisition AU part 2

"Inquisitor, may I have a word please?"

Ellana paused on her way into the rotunda at the sound of a friendly voice. The elf looked up to see a head of long white hair hanging over the side from the library. She smiles at the serene face of Noel. He made his way upstairs meeting the inquisitor with a bounce in his step.

"Follow me, I've somewhere to show you." He smiled leading her out of the fresco covered room.

He pulled her through Cullen's office to the small tower in the most secluded corner of skyhold that overlooked the barn and stables.

The once empty web covered space had been transformed into a warm and inviting room filled with many trinkets, instruments, plants, and surprisingly weapon parts. Ellana looked around taking in the mound of soft looking cushions with blankets that made up a bed, the shelves filled with books of all kinds, and the large table covered in a mortars, pestles, empty pots, cut up herbs and powders. Noel shifted as he waited for the elf to focus on him again before speaking.

"I wish to thank you for rescuing me. I may not have any connections, but what I do have I will pledge to you." He started. "I am a mage. I spent most of my time, when I wasn't entertaining greedy monarchs, teaching myself how to use my magic. I may not have developed a flair for lightning or fire but I did learn something else."

A soft green glow enveloped the Qunari before two more of him phased into existence.

"Amazing." Ellana gasped at the sight of 3 smiling Noels.

"I can replicate myself with soul Magic and make as many copies as I want. I often used it as a tactic to escape my usual duties if it involved unsavory practices. It's not much, but it got me through a lot of days."

One of the copies made its way to the table and started cutting more herbs. The other sat on the plush chair beside the table and plucked at the strings of a lute curiously. The real Noel smiled at the Inquisitor eagerly.

"If you have need of me in battle I will not deny you."

"Of course Noel, I'm happy you are here."

Ellana took the time to study the taller male as he drifted once more. He had filled out some, most likely Bull forcing him to eat more than the small meal a day he insisted on. He seemed happier as well.

"How are you liking it here?" The inquisitor asked.

"I have taken a liking to some of the things the others have shown me. Varric taught me how to play Wicked Grace. Lady Vivienne has taken me to her favorite spa claiming I needed to be pampered for a day. Cole was oddly understanding about something, but I don't know what. Solas is teaching me to read. I found a rather fascinating book on Tevinter myths and Dorian has taken to correcting anything I found in the book. He's rather sweet, I see what the Iron Bull sees in him." Noel gushes before pausing to giggle. "Bull has taken me under his wing. he says I'm like a child or a little sibling that needs to be protected from the world until I fully understand it."

Noel huffs falling back into his pillow pile drawing an irritated screech from something under the blankets. Noel cooed out an apology to a small scaly creature that popped out causing the inquisitor to freeze up. Noel continued to speak as he pets the small chirping beast.

"I understand his reasoning but I'm not a child. Xanxus, one of the dwarfs with Bull, is very appealing to me. Once he started speaking I found myself wanting to go to his bed. I just haven't found the right way to tell him yet. Dorian says subtlety is for the weak and I agree I think it is best that I confess my lust and admiration of him.

"IS THAT A VARGHEST HATCHLING?!" Ellana shouted completely blocking out Noel's admission of liking the moody Dwarf.

"Oh is that what ma Babette is? One of the traveling merchants told me it was a dragon egg."

"YOU TOOK IT EXPECTING IT TO BE DRAGON?!"

"Yes."

At that moment Xanxus walked in through the door with an annoyed expression and paused taking in the Inquisitor and Noel. He glanced at the Varghest giving it a once-over before turning to face his elven leader.

"She's not dangerous. She gets along well with my Bester and he's a wyvern. If anything she's just an overgrown cat that doesn't know what she actually is." He explained defending the creature as it nuzzled Noel in hopes of pats.

"You have a wyvern?! I haven't seen one near here nor while we were in Haven?!"

"I've had him for years. Saved him from an Orlesian Noble's hunting party. They wanted his hide since he is white " Xanxus smirked. "If you haven't seen him by now he's doing his job."

"Are you serious right now? You just let a Wyvern roam free without fear of him attacking people?" Ellana asked in disbelief.

"Yes."

Ellana threw her hands up in defeat before speaking again.

"You know what I'm not going to deal with this. If it comes up just say I said it was fine and keep your animals in line. I'm going to go spend some time with Solas excuse me."

The Inquisitor made a hasty retreat leaving a confused Qunari and an amused Dwarf in her wake.

"Does she not like draconic creatures?" Noel questioned.

"I don't think that was what the issue was babe." Xanxus replied settling beside the lavender-skinned man.

"Do you want to have sex with me?" Noel asked bluntly as he shooed Babette back to the pillow cave he set up for her.

Xanxus looked at the other in mild sock.

"Uh, sure. Why not."


	23. Naruto AU part 2

Noel hissed at anyone that set foot near him as he clutched a sleeping blonde baby closer to his chest. Xanxus was at his back with his eyes piercing through the matron of the orphanage with their wide-eyed daughter gazing curiously from his arms.

"I don't give a flying fuck about any of that shit. I'm taking him and if anyone on the council has anything to say they can come to my house and speak to my door because I. AM. KEEPING. HIM."

The woman paled as the tealette pulled several senbon from his pouch.

"Step out of my way."

The old woman shivered and moved away from the door. Noel snorted and walked out of the orphanage with a smirk. Xanxus handed his daughter a teething kunai as he followed.

"How long do you think it will take for the Hokage to come knocking?" He asked his boyfriend.

"It's not Hiruzen i'm worried about. He knows that Kushina, Minato and Lady Biwako planned a chain of people Naruto was meant to go to in case she and Minato died. Jiraiya, Mikoto, Biwako, then me. Jiraiya ran away to who fucking knows where, Fugaku and Mikoto are under pressure from the counsel's suspicious of the clan, and Biwako was killed in the attack. That leaves me. I'm pretty sure they also had Kakashi in mind, but he is in no way mentally or physically able to take care of a baby." Noel sighed as he gazed down at the sleeping child. "It's Danzo I fear. He already tried to sink his filthy claws into my team. I will not allow him to bring harm to this kid."

When they finally made it to their modest 2 floor home, that they slapped numerous seals on the moment they paid for it, they put Naruto into Ten Ten's crib as Xanxus set their daughter in her playpen. She squealed in glee as she picked up her toy sword to swing around. Noel sighed and slumped into Xanxus as the stress of the situation he was kicking upset in.

"Shit Xanxus what are we going to do if he sets his little pets on us?" Noel asked.

"Kill them." He replied leading Noel to their living room.

"It's never that simple." Noel laughs.

"I see you two are stirring up another fuss." A voice drawled from their sofa.

Noel snorted as he walked into the room. The sight of the familiar messy haired teen brought a smile to his face.

"Shouldn't you be out in the village terrorizing the masses." Noel grinned at the teen.

"If you must know, I just got back when I caught wind of what you two did. Taking Naruto wasn't a smart move Noel." Kakashi stated as he stretched out on their couch.

Noel fell into a nearby chair with a scowl and Xanxus sat in his large plush chair.

"It doesn't matter what kind of move it was all that mattered was getting Naruto out of there and somewhere safe were people actually love him and want him. You should have seen the way that woman looked at him, as if he was a disease or an insect on the bottom of her shoe. He's only a baby he shouldn't have to deal with any of this hatred. He doesn't deserve any of this hatred. Those ignorant fucks don't care, all they see when they look at this child is a monster and I will not let that happen any longer." Noel growled as tears started to trail down his cheeks.

Xanxus passed his partner a box of tissues as he frowned at the tears.

"I understand your reasoning and I never said I was against you taking Naruto from the orphanage." Kakashi replied with a tired look. "I just meant be more subtle."

"This whole village has gone to shit and if one move is made against him while he's in my care I'm taking him and our daughter and I'm leaving." Noel huffed drying his eyes. "You're more than welcome to come."

"Somehow I don't think it'll come to that." Xanxus said.

"What do you mean?" Noel asked confused.

"There's no way that the Hokage is going to let a tailed beast out of this Village; especially not the nine tails." He replied.

"Those with the beasts have the power." Kakashi spoke softly.

"Exactly."

It wasn't long until the anbu showed up at their home. The Hokage, as well as his advisors, were present as well. Xanxus shoved Kakashi up the stairs to the kids as Noel answered the door, but didn't make a move to allow them in.

"We're not giving him back. I know you know I'm the only one who can take him now. Your village made damn well sure of it too."

"Now Noel we really don't need to come to any of…" Hiruzen started.

"Bull. Shit." Noel cut him off. "Naruto is a baby who deserves love and home not that shit orphanage where the matron kept him in a pile of rags in a box. If Minato could see how you left his child I'm pretty sure he would have shoved his goddamn Rasengan through your neck Lord Hokage."

The anbu tensed at his words and the advisors looked outraged. Danzo remained impassive.

"I think your emotions are clouding your judgment." The bandaged man spoke.

Noel whipped around and bared his teeth at the older man. Xanxus was close to using his Sharingan.

"And I think you need to stay as far away from me as possible Danzo." Noel hissed.

"You're not welcome in or near our home. The Hokage and the other two advisors can stay but you must leave." Xanxus spoke in a controlled voice.

"Explain yourselves." Hiruzen said confused at their aggression.

"No, we have our reasons and will keep them to ourselves. The only issue you came here for was Naruto and we're keeping him like Kushina wanted, like Minato wanted, like Biwako wanted."

They watched the Hokage visibly flinch at the sound of his deceased wife's name. Before sighing in defeat.

"I suppose we have no choice then."

"Lord Hokage surely you don't mean to leave the boy here. The council will be up in arms" Utatane said in anger.

"Only the civilian council will be shiting bricks. The clans will probably support us." Xanxus replied to her grievance.

"You'll take him if we don't allow him to stay." Hiruzen said giving the couple a calculating stare.

"You know us well Lord Hokage." Noel smirked.

"Then I shall allow him to stay in your home." Hiruzen smiled.

Noel smiled leaning back into Xanxus.

"Thank you Lord Hokage and should anything happen to either of us; know that it was a plot in order to throw Naruto back into the orphanage not because we were hurt on a mission or anything like that. The likelihood of us getting hurt now is slim to none now that we have someone to care for. Xanxus smirked.

"What makes you say this?" Hiruzen asked curiously.

"All I have to say is that we can pull trees out by the roots and we can burn them to ash before they hit the ground again."

The Hokage look puzzled by the words. Danzo, however, looked Furious as the group finally walked away from their home.

"I guess now is the time to watch our backs." Noel hummed.

"It's no different from every other day of the week." Xanxus huffed.


	24. Mass Effect AU part 3

"Do you have a face under there?" Jack asked as she poked at her food.

"Do you have skin under there? Of course, I have a fucking face. I'm a living breathing sentient being."

"You're so sassy. I absolutely adore you." Kasumi laughed.

"And you're mischievous and I absolutely adore you." Noel chirped.

"How do you and the Turian fuck." Jack asked completely out of the blue.

"Can we please stop this conversation?" Jacob asked in a strained voice.

"Aw is the little Cerberus mutt feeling embarrassed" Jack taunted. "You can't talk with the big kids?"

"No, I just think it's not proper dinner conversation." He growled back.

"Well too fucking bad, I want to know how they do it" Jack sneered.

"I must admit I find myself curious as well." Kasumi grinned.

"The same way 2 human guys go at it." Noel shrugged causing Jack to laugh.

"Have you ever slept with a human or an Asari?" Kasumi asked.

"No." Noel laughed.

"How about other Turians?" Jack pressed. "I mean they are ugly as shit to me but they have really sexy voices so I probably wouldn't say no."

"I've never been with anyone but Xanxus." Noel replied.

"He took your boyginity?" Jack laughed.

"Actually I sold my body to him when I got to the Citadel after being exiled from the Migrant Fleet." Noel answered.

Everyone seemed shocked, but before they could ask more questions they were interrupted.

"Shepard we have a problem." Came the gruff voice of the Normandy's most temperamental Turian.

Xanxus approached John with a glare and an equally pissed varren at his heels. Today was apparently not a day of peace. Noel sighed and turned to face his lover as he sipped water through a straw. Jacob glared at Xanxus as Kasumi and Jack grinned, they were always up for the drama that followed the couple Kasumi dubbed Xoel.

"My right hand just informed me that a shipment of my custom widows has been stolen by some piece of shit Batarian pirate."

"Widows?" John asked with narrowed eyes.

"The sniper rifle." Noel supplied standing from his chair. "Did Squalo say where they were heading?"

"One of Illium's moons." Xanxus said before shifting nervously. "He also informed me that the person delivering the shipment was injured badly."

Noel eyed the turian's nervous stance before a glare settled on his face.

"Who?"

That question sent shivers down the spine of every human present. Xanxus looked his lover in the eye with only mild fear.

"Bel."

Noel took a breath before turning to face John, making the commander freeze up like a rabbit cornered by a wolf.

"Go kill those fuckers." Noel said softly with a look that rivaled an angry thresher maw.

John slowly nodded and made his way to the elevator, giving the Quarian a wide berth.

"Jack go with them. They need a biotic and I don't trust the Cerberus goons." Noel said to the woman with slightly hollow eyes.

She nodded sensing the seriousness of the situation before jogging after the commander. Noel could count on both hands the number of people he cared for in this galaxy. Xanxus was his lover, Fran his baby brother, Lussuria his best friend, and then there was Kenn and Belphegor his children in all but blood. While Kenn had joined him only a few months after the start of the younger's pilgrimage, Belphegor had been with him since he was a child. If anything happened to him Noel would eradicate the group who took him.

"Are you alright?" Kasumi asked carefully.

Noel glanced at the human and gave a nod.

"Yes, I just need to go think for a little while. I'll be in starboard observation."

Noel stood from the chair and left the room with a downcast gaze.

It was some hours later that the door to the observation deck opened. Noel was gazing sightlessly out into the black of space not paying the one who entered any mind.

"The Prince demands that you acknowledge his presence when he arrives governess." A laughing voice demanded making Noel whip around in shock and relief.

"Bel?"

"Who else ushishishishi?" The teen laughed.

Noel jumped up pulling the blonde into his arms. Bel continued to laugh as he accepted the others worried embrace.

"Who hurt you?"

"They're dead now."

"Did Xanxus kill them all?"

"He blew up their ship for good measure."

Noel stepped back to take in the human's bruised face and busted lip. He gently tugged the teen to the infirmary. He pushed him to sit on the bed and stepped away so that the doctor could look him over. He left them and made his way down to hangar deck and upon seeing his turian lover pounced on to him. He hooked his legs around Xanxus' waist as he clung to the black fatigues.

"Thank you."

Xanxus grunted as he wrapped his arm around the quarian.

"I know how you feel about the kid. I saved him because of you but also because he's mine too." Xanxus said as he sat on a nearby cot holding Noel in his lap.

"I knew you loved him, even if he is a little shit." Noel snorted.

"No one said anything about love. I tolerate that little bastard."

"Aw is the big bad Turian upset?" Noel cooed in a baby voice.

"The big bad Turian is about a second away from mauling you."

"Is he? Well, I think he deserves to get a little bite. After all, he bought one of my babies home?"

"Oh Spirits, you don't call them that to their face do you?"

"Course I do why wouldn't I?"

"They're going to have the biggest fucking ego I hope you understand that." Xanxus huffed leaning his forehead onto the Quarian's helmet

"Better they know that now than have someone have low expectations of them later."

"I hate to see what Kenn will be like in a year."

"Beautiful and deadly."

"Please stop."

"Love you too darling."


	25. Yuri! on Ice AU part 4

Fran's brow furrowed in confusion as he watched the skaters around him. He clung to Mukuro's indigo blazer as he narrowed his eyes on one in particular. His brother had always introduced him to his fellow skaters, but for some reason, he never introduced this one. Fran tugged on his sitter's jacket causing the teen to glance down with a smirk.

"What is it little one?"

"Take me over there." He all out demanded.

Mukuro glanced over to where the child pointed and a sharp grin stretched across his face.

"Of course."

There was absolutely no way in hell Mukuro would pass up the chance to see what his charge would say. He took Fran's hand and made his way over to the living legend of the ice, Viktor Nikiforov. The ash blonde male was speaking with one of Noel's old rink mates that left America and their coach this season. The Japanese man looked determined, but that quickly melted to confusion upon seeing the two approach them. Yuuri smiled, squatting down to Fran's height.

"Hey, Fran you remember me?" He asked hopefully.

Fran nodded making his layered locks bob with his head.

"Milkshake." Fran said patting the man's cheeks.

Yuuri sighed in resignation, Mukuro snorted in amusement, and Viktor damn near choked in shock. Fran raised his arms demanding to be picked up. Yuuri lifted the boy up and settled him on his hip.

"I was hoping you knew my actual name, but I see Noel never bothered to correct you." He said before glancing up at Viktor. "Fran this is my coach Viktor."

Fran took advantage of his new vantage point and stared up at the Russian male hard in concentration before speaking.

"Why does your forehead take up so much space, Is your hair running away from your eyebrows?" He asked innocently.

Viktor stumbled back with a look of horror on his face as he clutched the front of his coat where his heart would be. A pitiful whine escaped from him before he looked up to Yuuri with teary eyes. Mukuro outright laughed at the child's words. Yuuri just sighed in resignation.

"You're not bald Viktor." He said as if it was a normal occurrence.

"But yuuuuuriiiii." The Russian warbled with wet doe eyes.

Mukuro had managed to calm down long enough to speak to the two.

"That was worth this entire trip."

"Your a vicious thing aren't you?" Yuuri said staring at the teen with slight trepidation as he set Fran back on his feet. "Did you learn that from Noel too?"

Mukuro smirked and started to reply when he heard his name being called. He glanced over his shoulder to see a rapidly approaching Noel in his short program costume. Yuuri blushed a bit at the sight, but Viktor and the two adolescents didn't bat an eye.

"Bonjour Chérie." Noel cooed pecking Mukuro's cheek.

He repeated the action with a slightly struggling Fran before smiling at his former roommate.

"Yuuri my sweet thick little milkshake!" Noel laughed pulling the skater into a tight hug and kissing both of his cheeks in greeting.

"Hi, Noel." Yuuri smiled sheepishly at the affectionate male. "Why does your brother not know my name? Does he have a name for Phichit too?"

Noel smirked bending over to be eye level with his baby brother. Mukuro glared at a nearby rink assistant who ran into a wall as he stared at the skater's slightly visibly backside.

"Who's my other roommate my little mermaid?"

"Peaches." Fran said immediately as he raised his arms to be picked up.

Noel grinned lifting the small boy and settling him on his lace clad hip. Yuuri groaned.

"What happened?" Noel asked in French while looking at Mukuro expectantly.

The teen grinned nodding toward the blank-faced child.

"He called the living legend bald."

Noel snorted before full on laughing at the Russian skater.

"Viktor isn't bald baby." Noel cooed at the scrunched up face of the child. "In fact, his hair use to be nearly as long as mine."

"Use to?" Fran asked with a tilt of his head.

"Yes, little Fran." A deep and almost erotic voice said as Christophe Giacometti wandered up to the group.

He did a once over of Noel and gave an appreciative whistle.

"My you are a vision in lace aren't you vixen." He purred.

"All the better to make a man hot and bothered my dear." Noel smirked casting a glance over to a scowling figure in the nearby stands.

Chris glanced up and grinned at the sight.

"Nice catch." He said appreciatively.

"Why thank you." Noel grinned.

Fran tugged on a piece of Noel's loose hair to gain his attention. Noel gave him a questioning look.

"Peaches is coming." Fran informed pointing at a rapidly approaching Phichit.

The Thai skater rushed up to them pulling the Frenchman and his brother into a tight squeeze.

"Bubbles that was awesome!" Phichit cried before whipping out his selfie stick and held it up above them. "Selfie!"

Noel immediately smiled and gave the camera a teasing wink as the skaters bracketed Fran and squished their cheeks together. Once Phichit posted the photo he grinned at the gathered group with a bright smile. He reached out to pinch Fran's cheek earning an unhappy whine and little hands trying to bat away the fingers.

"So do you think he took the bait?" He asked.

"Naturally." Noel replied.

"Then all you need to do is string him along and you'll find yourself in bed quicker than your pole descent." Phichit said confidently.

"That was more than I needed to know about you." Mukuro frowned.

"Just be glad I told M I was heading to the bathroom and not Fran. She was desperate to see you after her 'sexy' performance." Noel sighed.

"You mean your sexy performance." Phichit corrected.

"What about Yuuri's? He left us and became a damn sex god." Noel laughed.

"Noel!" Yuuri hissed.

"Milkshake is a sex god?" Fran asked.

Yuuri blushed in embarrassment.


	26. Naruto AU part 3

Shibi sat in silence mildly concerned, but mostly exasperated. Noel was complaining again and it actually sounded like he had a very good reason to.

"I don't know how the ass hole did it, but he got the council to overturn my request to go back to T&I. He was pushing for me to go into fucking seduction corps." Noel growled into his tea. "You are now looking at the division head."

Shibi's brow rose in shock.

"They just made you the leader?"

"Apparently I have a reputation and they were dying for a chance to pull me on board."

"You did dress in drag a lot during our genin days." Shibi pointed out.

Noel shrugged not caring too much for their D rank fiascos at the moment.

"At least they approved my nomination for Ibiki. The Hokage is promoting him to special jonin status." Noel smiled. "I think I should inform Orochimaru sensei about everything going on now. He has been helping Xanxus and me with our little side project."

Shibi still found it surprising to hear about Noel's relationship to the only sannin left in the village. Not long into their squad days, Noel sought out the man to learn everything he could about poisons. Noel was plenty proficient in them beforehand, but he was also an ambitious kid. Shibi knew that his teammate stalked the man for well over a month before the sannin caved. The mentorship worked out in more ways than one for the pair. The village eased up on their judgmental view of the two when they constantly had to see the two mock and hiss at one another like a petulant child to their parent. Orochimaru was also more open to accepting his second apprentice Anko, once Noel was promoted.

"I bet he was trying to throw a cog in Xanxus and I's marriage. We really pissed him off when we showed up in the middle of his 'meeting' with Shisui."

"What?" Shibi asked in confusion.

"I don't know, but I'm pretty sure we prevented something horrible and gained some respect from the Uchiha clan somehow. Itachi actually graced me with a hug." Noel said ending with an excited squeal.

Shibi put his head in his hands. He really needed to have a talk with Noel about his doting on the Uchiha heir.

"Anyway Fugaku wanted to accept Xanxus back into the clan, but the elders are still old dicks and rejected his proposal." Noel snorted. "Fugaku has gained some brownie points with me, however, because he has started to treat Xanxus like family instead of a dirty secret. He's still a douche though."

Shibi just knew Noel was about to go onto another rant.

* * *

Naruto hummed as he refilled his water can and set about watering his garden. It was one of the few things he asked for and his surrogate parents did not deny him the use of their mostly unused backyard. Noel kept a few potted plants for some of his poisons, but not much else considering their basement was converted to a training room.

Noel stood vigilant from the porch with a soft smile on his face. The little ball of sunshine may look like Minato, but he was defiantly Kushina's kid. If he wasn't in the calm of his garden he was out pranking the residents of the village with elaborate and often genius traps. Noel was so proud of all the effort the kid put in that he couldn't ever bring himself to punish him. Right before he started the academy, Noel sat the blonde down and told him the truth about his parents and the Kyuubi attack. Xanxus and Kakashi filled in any blanks, and they all made sure Naruto understood how much he was wanted and loved. Noel never wanted to see this child cry again. Naruto was a tiny sun that they all orbited and basked in the light of. Xanxus already threatened half the village for the kid. Noel and Tsume got a majority of the clans on Naruto's side whenever the civilian council reared its ugly head to spit venom at them. It was a rough and continuous battle. Noel wouldn't give this up for anything. Their comfortable silence was broken by the loud call of the only female in their family.

"Papa! I brought my team home to meet you guys!" Noel heard his daughter call out from inside the house.

Naruto looked up from watering his vegetable garden with curiosity and excitement in his eyes. Noel felt out for the chakra signatures and froze up. Naruto grew confused at his sudden stillness and tugged on his guardian's sleeve.

"What's wrong Papa?"

"Oh, nothing." Noel sighed in resignation. "Just an unavoidable situation is all."

"Okay." Naruto nodded with a huge grin.

Noel smirked at the boy pulling him into a one-armed hug.

"Want to help with the snacks?"

"Yes!"

They made their way inside and were greeted with the sight of a smiling TenTen, brooding Hyuuga, and…

"Oh shit, he reproduced." Noel whispered in disbelief. "Kashi is going to freak-out."

"Language!" TenTen and Naruto shouted in unison.

Noel rolled his eyes and walked to one of the nearby bookshelves to place a few Ryo in a 'swear jar'. He turned back to the team and gave them a forced smile.

"Welcome to my home Gai, so nice to see you."

The green-clad ninja gave a blinding grin before jumping into one of his tangents. Xanxus was lucky he left to visit Mikoto.

* * *

"It's always good to see you Xanxus." Mikoto smiled setting some tea on the table before them. "Fugaku wanted you to know that he was sorry he is missing our weekly tea. I almost thought you wouldn't make it."

Itachi had a rare day off and was settled across from the red-eyed male with a pouting Sasuke snuggled into his side.

"Yeah." Xanxus replied nodding in thanks when she handed him a cup. "I just got back from Suna and I really needed to spend some time with Naruto after the shit I saw there."

"Oh? What happened?" She asked worriedly.

"Saw this kid there. He was all by himself. Everyone isolated him and called him a monster under their breath." Xanxus started before letting out a snort. "Noel wanted to kidnap him and add him to our family. I said no since it was technically the Kazekage's kid, but I managed to slip one of Noel's little hairpins to him before I left."

"What would that do?" Sasuke asked curiously.

Xanxus smirked.

"It means I marked the kid with the symbol of The Green Fairy."

"Who's that?"

"The hallucinogenic ninja assassin guaranteed to wreck your mind before taking you out." Shisui informed dramatically upon his entrance. "He also happens to be known as Noel the deus ex-machina of Konoha."

"What's a d…"

"Please leave it be Sasuke. He doesn't need any more air in his head." Itachi smiled at his baby brother.

"Okay!" The boy chirped forgetting all about his cousin in favor of his beloved brother.

Shisui sulked as Mikoto giggled and Xanxus grinned.

* * *

It was later that afternoon that Xanxus heard knocking at the door. Noel stood from his chair and went to answer.

"We have been summoned by the Hokage." Orochimaru smirked as the door to his former pupil's home opened.

"Why are you playing messenger?"

"I was told it was a personal matter."

"Well, that's not suspicious at all."

"Subtlety was never sensei's strong suit. Not like us."

"You're awfully catty today? What gives?"

"Our little hobby gained some fruit and lead me to a few revelations we can use."

"Sounds promising, do we have a set date yet?"

"Not yet. There are still far too many variables to consider."

"Then I guess we will continue to bide our time."

Teacher and student were interrupted by the irritated voice of Xanxus.

"Can you two stop plotting in the doorway? I'd like to get this shit over with before dinner time."

"Just when I thought you had a redeemable quality." Orochimaru sneered.

"I don't give a fuck." Xanxus deadpanned.

"I can tell."

"Stop acting like you two don't like each other." Noel grinned leading the two nin away toward the Hokage's office.

* * *

"I'm sorry could you repeat that?" Noel hissed.

Orochimaru stood at the younger's side with a smug grin on his face as he stared down the Hokage in amusement.

"Yes, sensei, repeat it."

Hiruzen really wanted a bottle of sake at the moment.

"I said, and I know you heard me, that a mission came in from an elderly woman who lives on the border between fire and grass country. She claims that her daughter gave up a child here years ago for fear that they would be harmed. At the time the woman's family owed a great debt to a group of bandits. The bandits threatened to take her daughter's firstborn. The daughter lied and claimed the child was stillborn and buried."

"Skip to the last bit please." Noel gritted out as Xanxus rubbed soothing circles into the small of his back.

"The woman stated that the bandits were dealt with a long while ago and her daughter went on to have another child about 12 years later. Her daughter unfortunately passed in childbirth and the husband on a mission to Iwa. She has raised the child for the past 19 years on her own. The client came across a bingo book a week ago with your picture inside and believes that you are the baby her daughter gave up."

"Is there any truth to her claims?" Xanxus asked.

Hiruzen pulled three photos from the packet and slid them toward the three nin. Orochimaru picked them up and glanced over them. His eyes widened as he quickly handed them to his former student. Noel nearly fainted in shock. The first photo may as well have been him with shorter hair and makeup. She smiled in the picture with a hand on her pregnant belly. The next was a young boy with a bored expression on his face staring into the camera. He too had the same hair, complexion, and eyes as Noel and the pregnant woman. The last was a clipping of his latest bingo book entry with a photo from his chunin exams. His entry had yet to be updated from the time they entered him in the first place. He pissed a lot of people off that year, hence the bounty.

"Can't argue with that resemblance." Xanxus huffed.

"She also informed us that your supposed brother would be arriving soon to get to know his family." Hiruzen added.

"And just when did you receive this client's request ?" Noel asked in a strained voice.

"A week ago."

"Are fucking serious!?"

A knock sounded interrupting what could have been a homicide in the making. Iruka popped his head in with a strained smile on his face.

"Lord Hokage, there is an unaffiliated ninja here to see you. He claims that you were informed about his arrival already.

"Send him in."

The door was pushed open allowing a willowy male of average height into the office. The blank-faced young adult glanced around the office in disdain before his teal pupilless eyes fell on the gaping face of what could have been his long-haired doppelganger.

"Yo." Fran said casually lifting a hand in greeting to his long-lost elder brother.

"Well, I guess there are two of you now." Orochimaru laughed in sadistic amusement.

Hiruzen paled and suddenly felt that this idea would bring far more trouble than it should have.


	27. Mass Effect AU part 4

Shepard and Tali had just finished their debriefing when the annoyed voice of Miranda came over the intercom.

"Shepard we received an unusual message from Kahje. They claim to have something of extream importance for us to look into."

"A hanar does?" Shepard asked incredulously as he leads Tali to her new station in engineering.

"No, they stated very clearly that they are not a hanar." Miranda sighs in irritation. "They sent me coordinates to a residence in one of the dome cities.

"Did the sender use a name?" Shepard asked.

"Fran."

"What?" Xanxus paused on his way to the lift. "Did you just say, Fran?"

"Yes." Miranda answered annoyed at repeating herself.

The turian whips around to Shepard with an intense gaze.

"We need to take Noel and go to that planet."

"Why? What does it have to do with Noel?" Shepard asked confused at the Turians urging.

"Fran is his little brother."

"I thought you lived on the Citadel?" Shepard asked.

"I do. However, after I met Xanxus my parents sent a message about raising my brother away from the fleet. Apparently, my actions had brought suspicion upon them and they didn't want my brother involved. We organized a meet up; I took my brother, along with Bel, and raised them here on Kahje." Noel said. "I renamed him Fran for his protection from the life I live in the underground."

"Your real name isn't Noel?" Shepard asked surprised.

"No. It isn't." Noel said softly as the transporter landed in front of a small apartment complex. "I gave up my name the day I decided that befriending and studying the geth was more important than the fleet.

Tali's eyes widened as she finally understood exactly who stood before her. She took in his androgynous body type, unusual name, and criminal background before everything seemed to snap into place in her mind.

"You're Fae'Xaala Nar Gehanna!" She squealed making Noel freeze in place. "You are the youngest quarian in history to be exiled from the migrant fleet!"

Noel turned to her and nodded. Xanxus and Kenn, who up to that point were silent looked at Noel with a sympathetic gaze. They knew how hush hush he was on his life before the exile.

"I am."

Without another word he led them up to a door and punched in a code to unlock it. As soon as the door shut the decontamination scan started.

"Why the cleaning?" Shepard asked.

"Because I designed the house, with the Hanar's help, to basically be a giant clean room. A place I can remove my enviro suit safely within for extended periods of time." Noel replied in a proud tone.

"That's amazing!" Tali chirped excitedly. "How long are you able to go without your suit?"

"I manage about 4hours outside a clean room without a suit before my immune system starts going screwy." Noel informed. "I can go 9 within one, but it took years for my body to adjust. Fran can go without a bit longer than me though."

Tali seemed starstruck over the elder quarian as the decontamination finally ended. The groups stepped into the next room and were greeted with the sight of a head of teal hair and a large screen playing Fleet and Flotilla.

"Are you kidding me Fran? Again with this vid?" Noel asked amused.

Fran shifted on the couch and turned around to eye the group curiously. Shepard froze in shock. The lavender skin being held swirling marks decorating rounded cheeks and a slender neck. Unnatural glowing eyes stared at the group with a bored gaze. Kenn immediately joined the other young adult on the couch to watch the cheesy romance on screen.

"Did you send the commander a message?" Noel asked as he settled in a nearby chair.

"Yeah." Fran said in boredom as his eyes shifted away from the frozen human. "I received a message from my research team. Apparently, their experiment with the thorian rounds I was developing for you went south. The scientists that were charged with repurposing the spores were exposed to the gas and went crazy. I figured since Shepard dealt with them before he could do it again."

Noel nodded before facing Shepard. The commander still hadn't looked away from his baby brother's face. He laughed finally snapping the human out of it.

"Yes, that's what we look like." Noel hummed.

"You're hair is a different color than mine." Tali told the younger male.

"Brother and I have the same shade." He smirked.

Noel stood shoving his lover into the chair he vacated and petting Bester's head in affection.

"Let's go, commander, we can use knock out rounds." Noel grinned patting his shoulder as he pushed Tali toward the door.

Commander Shepard was staring again, but this time it was directed on his squad mate's now revealed face. His hair was the same jewel tone as Fran, but much longer and piled into a messy bun. Noel could have been his younger siblings twin if his face and eyes were not so narrow.

"Kolyat around?" Noel asked as his fluorescent eyes read through a datapad.

"No, and I'm starting to miss him. The beds cold now." Fran yawned leaning against the elder's legs.

"All it takes is a tasteful nude and a well-acted begging audio clip and trust me he'll be on the first ship back." Noel chirped making Tali choke in disbelief. "I guarantee it."

Xanxus smirked and settled a talon tipped hand on the unmasked quarian's face. Shepard shook his head in amusement and disbelief.

"No, he won't. He took a contract." Fran informed with an annoyed frown.

"Where?" Noel asked curiously. "He hasn't made that much of a name for himself yet."

"Citadel I think."

"Come with us then; I'm sure Kenn would be more than happy to look after the house for us."

Fran's gaze drifted as he thought over his options. It couldn't hurt.

"Ok." Fran agreed moving to his feet. "I'll go pack."


	28. Yu Yu Hakusho AU part 1

"Oh dear." A voice purred in fascination. "The poor thing's still alive."

Hazy lilac eyes cracked open to take in the hazy visage of two figures. A hand reached out grasping his shoulder and flooding his weakened body with demonic energy. Another hand pulled the bamboo shoots from his body one by one. He noticed a glittering dust surrounding him before his body slumped as he drifted into darkness.

"He's lost a lot of blood darling."

"I can see that."

"Let's get him home."

The two figures gingerly picked up the unconscious male and carried him off through the forest.

Kuronue woke with a gasp. He blinked his eyes to get rid of the blurred vision. He glanced around him warily before his eyes settled on a demon with long sea-green hair braided over their shoulder revealing a large ornate tattoo of moth wings covering the expanse of their bare back. They turned around at the sound of his gasp and gave a mischievous smile.

"Finally awake I see."

Kuronue gazed at them in disbelief taking in their pointed ears, lithe frame, very visible flat chest, and calm eyes. The, definitely male, demon before him was beautiful and had apparently saved him. Kuronue sank back into his pallet with a shuttering breath.

"My name is Noel. My partner and I saved you from the bamboo trap." The demon informed him. "We stopped the blood loss, but you were so close to death that I had to put you in a healing stasis."

"How long." Kuronue's voice cracked horribly from no use.

"Nearly a year."

Kuronue was shocked. Why did it take so long?

"I'm guessing it took so long because I'm not proficient in healing. I am a moth demon who typically poisons others, not help them." Noel informed as he stood from his chair by the fire. "Xanxus, my lover, and I were making our way home from a rather irritating visit with his family when we chanced upon you. Lucky for you we lived close by."

Kuronue snorted at his casual flippant tone. It reminded him of his own snarky lover. At that thought, Kuronue sat up in urgency and panic.

"Yoko! I need to get back to Yoko! Oh, fuck he probably thinks I'm dead!" He cried in panic.

Noel stared at him in confusion before realization dawned on him.

"You're Kuronue, partner of Yoko Kurama, the famous thief."

"Yeah." Kuronue chocked. "I need to get to Yoko."

Noel frowned placing a slender hand on the bat's shoulder.

"Yoko Kurama was said to have been killed in a pursuit a few months back."

Kuronue's eyes widened in shock as tears built up in his eyes. Yoko was gone. His Yoko was gone.

"I'm sorry." Noel said softly wrapping his arms around the taller demon. "I'm so sorry."

A chocked sob left him as he clung to the green haired demon. If only he hadn't gone back for the pendant; even if Yoko gifted it to him.

"I can't believe I let you two drag me to this shit show." Kuronue groaned. "And of course they are rinkside."

15 years had passed since his awakening and he remained with the winged couple for most of that time. Over the course of his stay, he came to realize something about the couple. They were unhealthily addicted to drama. They would go out of their way to watch someone's life fall apart and would gladly bring snacks to watch it. That was why they invited (dragged) him to the dark tournament. He couldn't be bothered to listen to the annoyingly loud announcer's introductions and comments until she said 'Kurama'. He trained his eyes on the redhead with a familiar name and weapon to his Yoko. Maybe he was a fanboy.

"You'll be surprised lovely." Noel cooed at him in a sickly sweet voice; breaking his train of thought. "Team Urameshi's fight with Team Masho the other day was beautiful. I've never seen Jin so upbeat in a fight here."

"Whatever." Kuronue huffed gazing down in the ring. "What about these guys?"

"Team Uraotogi is full of shit." Xanxus huffed as a tiny man with a fishing pole stood in the ring with a redhead as they traded blows with whips.

The man stopped whipping his fishing pole and pulled out a box. The trio was confused as he opened it releasing smoke into a barrier surrounding the ring. Kuronue squinted trying to see when he felt it. The beautiful rose scented power that rolled off of his loves demonic energy like a beckoning call. Kuronue stood quickly making the brash decision to jump the partition, ignoring Noel's half-ass calls for him to stop, and stood next to team Urameshi. His gaze was locked on the smoke as he concentrated on the voices within the barrier.

"I think, perhaps, I regressed further than you intended." A familiar baritone spoke sending shivers down his spine. "And just as I had come to accept my human captivity."

The tiny man whimpered.

"Yoko has returned they cry."

"DID YOU SAY YOKO! YOKO THE SPIRIT FOX! THE LEGENDARY BANDIT YOKO! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH KURAMA I LIKED HIM A LOT BETTER!"

Kuronue wanted to cry.

"Fuck yes that's him." He sighed in relief and deeply seeded admiration; attracting the attention of the two fighters beside him.

"Who the hell are you?!" The loudmouth human shrieked at him.

Kuronue turned to the human with a confused tilt of his head innocently blinking before a smirk stretched across his face.

"Who, me?" He laughed. "I'm just a thief."

As the buffoon started to yell at him again the shorter demon narrowed his eyes on Kuronue. The bat only had eyes for the smoke filled ring. They all felt as Yoko's immense demonic power lashed out. Kuronue waited patiently on bated breath until finally, the smoke lifted. There he was. His beautiful…

"Yoko."

Shocked golden eyes snapped around to his face.

"Kuronue."


End file.
